Sex Q&A: Find Love In and Out of Marriage

Sonya’s Question:

Hello Liam:

I’m no longer in love with my husband of fifteen years, and I’m so love starved that I tend to look outside of my marriage for good sex and intimacy. I am currently in love with someone else, but I’m not sure how he feels about me. My intuition tells me that my husband has cheated on me numerous times, although I haven’t caught him. I want to live and be in love. I want a companion to share my life. I long for true love. How do I get past all of the confusion?

Psychic Liam ext. 9290’s Response:

Sonya, this world is filled with a wide variety of people, all with various natures, energies, and needs. Most of them, through no fault of their own, are quite oblivious to their own inner worlds and workings. When I consider you, I encounter someone with a magnificently romantic form. You are a sexual being flush with promise, and your lovers are like ignition points. You are a poetic soul wearing the mask of a bored housewife. Your costume is so well worn and your props so utterly believable, it seems you’ve fallen for the little drama yourself. Dear actress, let’s you and I remove all that make-up, and gaze into the mirror of the soul.

Why can’t you accept that you enjoy making love to many different men? What’s so wrong with enjoying being hunted; being wooed and courted, captured, and seduced? You adore being stalked. You offer the males who seek your charms a perilous conquest. It’s a harrowing mystery on which you thrive, and you fail to experience even a fraction of its real power and pleasure. You mask your enjoyment. Your inability to surrender to it completely has deadened you inside.

Your husband is a man with many issues, but I sense that you are quite wrong about his indiscretions. The voice you mistake for intuition is nothing more than the whisper of your own wishes. If your husband was indiscreet, would this not justify your midnight liaisons? I admit I see he has enjoyed a dalliance or two on occasion. The truth is, you’re the one inclined to immersion in the forbidden waters of extramarital expansion.

That’s who you are, and I have a strong feeling your husband knows it. He’s not as indifferent as you think. A good deal of his own sexual gratification, where you’re concerned, lies not in touching you, but in the teasing suspicion that you are being touched by others. Your extramarital activities please him on a deep subconscious level. You would be unwise to make an obvious issue of it. This is definitely something best relegated to the murky recesses of your minds. True exposure would destroy the innate passion that drives the drama for both of you. It would also force him to deal conventionally with what is a very unconventional aspect for him.

You say you seek “true love,” and a “companion to spend your life with.” These two things are seldom found in the same package. True love is measured in degrees of sheer breathlessness. It is ravenous and total, and people caught in the grip of it usually aren’t able to ponder a nice and cozy future. They’re too wrapped up in the rapture and agony of the moment. Such a love can be felt for years by lovers separated for decades. It can also begin and end within two heartbeats. It might turn into a long term relationship. However, those who obsess over the long term deaden themselves to the fever of the moment. Nature demands blood and payoffs.

You want to be in love? Get ready to sacrifice your home, your security, your sanity, and maybe your life. If the love is true, then forever is just a shuddering moment spent staring into your beloved’s eyes, and nothing exists beyond that place in time. You, my dear, don’t need to be in love to feel rapturous ecstasy with your sexual partners. For you, any sexual encounter can be magical.

The man you adore now, continue to adore. Fall deeply. Fall crazy mad, and be wild with it. You are a wild woman by nature, and there’s no reason for you not to entice him into your realm. I feel he is very drawn to you. You will have to encourage him more, because he is having a problem reading your cues and signals. Be friendly and sweet to him. Lean in close, breathe on his face, and let your hair brush his skin. Put your foot on top of his under the table, and give a playful little tap while engaging him in conversation. Be sure to let him have the pleasure of subduing you. A man like him needs the chase for his own satisfaction. Don’t think to keep him for more than a little while.

Make no bold moves to end your marriage. Be realistic in your wildness. You’re wasting a lot of time and energy wanting a perfect, pie-in- the-sky partner. In the end, all you have is yourself and your experiences. Your nature is a mysterious one. Relish it. Move from partner to partner as you wish, and never settle for being anything but the enchantress you were meant to be. Your life might well be different than what others know. Unlike many others, you’ll end the game without regret.

Liam