Holiday Hookups

Everybody needs a little action sometimes, and the holidays offer us more opportunity for random play than almost any other time of year. Between the seemingly non-stop parties, more relaxed office atmosphere, weekend shopping sprees and (spiked) hot chocolate, our gears are all greased up, primed and ready to make sweet love down by the fire…

But thanks in part to the little complications known as heightened emotions and expectations, rarely is there an easier time to get burned! So, if you’re one of those singletons, wondering whether that little smooch under the mistletoe is worth your while or if you’ll wind up dumped and known to all your co-workers as the office ho, ho, ho, this little “Holiday Hookup Guide” is for you. Before you get swept up in the spirit and give into all that holiday cheer, remember these three tips (and take note: they’re good all year ’round).

Eyes wide open
A tumble in the coatroom after one too many eggnog martinis is just that – a tumble in the coatroom. In most cases both you and the person who fell with you will want to either joke about it later or forget about it… which gives you something to consider. Now, if you’re just imbued with the sexy spirit and out for a little somethin’ somethin’, then there’s no reason to hold back – after all this is the time of year for giving! But if you’ve got your eyes set on someone and think this is a chance to turn your crush into your long-term lover, think again. Things happen when under the influence – not just of alcohol, but of the holiday spirit – but oftentimes Christmas is a lot like Vegas. Whatever happens at the holiday party, stays at the holiday party (after it makes its rounds on the gossip chain).

On that note…

Stay true to character
We’ve all heard the story of the usually shy co-workers who make fools of themselves at the office party, becoming fodder for the company smut mill… some of us have even been the co-workers in question. And while sure, crazy things can happen in the name of celebration, be aware that a public display at a work-related event will undoubtedly lead to gossip. If it’s the sort that might jeopardize your position (say you’re in an authority role or the potential paramour is actually your direct supervisor), it’s worth taking a second to consider the consequences. Think about the climate at your company. How have things like this gone down in the past? Don’t do something you’ll regret… and if you’re wondering, in the heat of the moment, if you might regret it – the answer is probably yes!

Don’t force it
In new-ish relationships, the holidays are a good gauge for telling if feelings are mutual. If you find yourself in a one-sided equation (say where you want to spend them together or meet each other’s families, etc. and the other person doesn’t), don’t try to force it. It will only put pressure on the relationship at what can already be a stressful time. While you may find yourself faced with information you don’t want to see, now is also not necessarily the time for drawing any conclusions or bringing it up. Take away your expectations of a “picture perfect” holiday season and try to experience your actual feelings – are they related to this person, or to what you think the season is “supposed to” look like? Expecting a fantasy can get us all into trouble. Expecting honesty and respect, on the other hand, should be de rigueur – any time of the year.