Beware the False Soulmate

“Follow your heart.” Ha! – Sometimes the heart sends confusing messages. Contemplation, counseling, friends, and readings can help us sort our true convictions from the false ones, though we flat-out disagree with the advice sometimes. Yet even that may tell us a lot. We usually need help sorting it out. But there’s always a lesson!

1) Strong message, wrong interpretation
Kellie had been divorced twice, and her children were grown. Neither of her ex-husbands shared her deep spiritual convictions. One day she met Frank, and felt an immediate charge. She blurted out, “You were sent.”

He responded, “You were chosen.”

Kellie believed she’d found her soulmate. She discovered numerous times they had almost crossed paths in this same lifetime. He claimed to be a shaman, and their first intimate encounter felt healing – so she sold her house, moved across the country, and bought a new home.

But Frank was secretive, unaffectionate and quick to accuse Kellie of wrongdoing. Her family worried about his past, which included substance abuse, philandering, and under-earning. Kellie still believed the two of them were meant to heal each other. As the problems persisted, she prayed to know the truth.

Then Frank cleaned out Kellie’s bank account, and left her for another woman. Kellie was confused since those feelings of deep connection remained. She had a reading with an Empath, who told her, “You thought you had met your soulmate – but instead, you had encountered your true nemesis.”

2) Strong message… and the soulmate’s traits!
Cara spent seven years having affairs with her first love, Tad. She felt a connection to him, and their astro-compatibility was great, too. But somehow he’d never commit. She felt the timing was off. Her mother, a psychic, said, “If it were meant to be, it would have already happened.” Cara at first disagreed – but eventually realized her feeling of connection didn’t mean he was the one.

She saw that Tad triggered her “Animus,” or male force – psychoanalyst Carl Jung wrote that each person has male and female essences, Animus and Anima. He believed we seek a mate who mirrors our inner essence of the opposite sex, and we project that image onto potential mates to see how it fits. (For same-sex relations, Animus and Anima may also be formulated as Self and Counter-Self.)

Cara thought about which qualities triggered her Animus. Finally, she found the right connection with Russ – who shared those same traits with Tad (though, interestingly, via a completely different astrological chart), yet brought fresh quirks into the mix. He truly loved her, and became a positive force in her life.

3) Strong convictions, right on target!
Jane was a serial dater. She often “fell in love with love.” She’d been dating Larry for some time, and though the relationship lacked passion, the friendship was strong – they planned to marry.

One night, alone with Larry’s best friend Tom, Jane sensed the world had somehow changed: a door had opened. Tom felt it, too. What to do?

Larry, her friends, and family all said she was fooling herself: Tom was lonely, and she wanted one more romantic conquest. Jane worried they might be right. Tom worried, too.

For two years, Jane and Tom did the “sensible” thing and stayed apart. But the feelings remained. Jane consulted Tarot. The cards indicated it would be easier to stay with Larry, at least in the short term. Jane didn’t like that. She now knewthe answer her heart was telling her – she decided to trust her feelings for Tom, and they took the leap of faith to be together. It was hard, but 10 years later they are married with two beautiful children. And still in love.

The language of the heart can be indirect – even when it appears to deceive, it always has something important to say! Listen.