5 Ways to Overcome Mental Roadblocks to Live the Life That You Want

This is it. Your life is passing you by. You’re miserable, afraid, disappointed in life and in yourself. Only you have the power, right now, to change it. It’s going to take a lot of work, including sacrificing old patterns of behavior to make way for a new you. Are you up for it? This regime isn’t for sissies—so get ready, because here we go!

1. You May Not Be Excused

It’s easy to blame other people or circumstances as to why you are not where you want to be in life. The reality is that even if others have added certain difficulties to your life—such as an absent parent, a spiteful boss, or an ex-lover—you must take responsibility for the part you have played in your current existence. You can choose to stay in a bad situation or to move on to something better. As long as you’re making excuses for why your life isn’t fulfilling, you will never own the power you have to refashion your life the way you want it to be.

2. A Goal Properly Set is Halfway Reached

This famous Abe Lincoln quote conveys how important it is to be smart about planning your personal goals. This means knowing what you want, and doing the research to figure out how to get it. For career goals, you will want to determine what classes and training you need to be eligible for the job. With financial goals, you will need to become efficient at saving money and learning how to invest properly. For family and romantic goals, you will need to figure out what you’re looking for, work on making yourself into the most complete person you can be, and immerse yourself in the dating market. If you set realistic, well thought-out goals for yourself, with each one you complete you will feel that much better about yourself and the direction your life is taking.

3. Honor the Moments

Life is but the sum of billions of moments, strung together to create our personal experience of existence—often so many of them are taken for granted or are diminished by everyday stresses and distractions as we race ahead towards that better job, house, or relationship. Having defined goals is good, but enjoying the moments along the way is what brings quality to your daily life. If all you do is live for tomorrow, you will be miserable today. Enjoy every step along the way so you do not look back on your life and regret all the valuable memories you have wasted. As you bring the positive energy that comes from enjoying and living in the moment into each environment you find yourself in, you will attract more positive energy, people, and experiences to your life.

4. Clean Out the Clutter

Obsessing over past events and holding on to grudges hinders your ability to move forward in life and be truly open to new experiences. Every new experience and person you meet will be clouded by your past anger, fear or self-loathing. It is only when you learn to forgive yourself and others, to let go of those destructive emotions, that you are truly free of them. You must learn how to make peace with your past, or you will never be able to achieve happiness or the new life you desire.

5. Do Something Everyday That Scares You

It is easy to fall into certain daily routines and comfort zones that we cling to robotically despite our continuing unhappiness. If you feel you are blocked somehow from achieving what you want in life, move outside of that comfort zone. Challenge yourself with new expectations, activities, and responsibilities. Make decisions everyday which encourage personal growth. Learn a new skill, increase your knowledge about an old one. Put yourself in situations that may scare you, but make you a braver, more capable human. Make yourself more valuable in your own life and in the lives of others. In doing this, you will open up new avenues in your life never before explored which will bring you, no matter how surreptitiously, one step closer to the life that you truly want.