Red Responds: Letting Go May Not Be the Answer

Christina from Los Angeles, CA

I don’t know if I can do this for much longer. I have been involved with a man for close to five years. When we’re together, we’re like a married couple who love each other dearly, and although it’s passionate and intense when we’re together, we’ve never had the time needed to see if we’re truly compatible beyond the wild lovemaking and sweet friendship. We’re both single, travel a lot, and live thousands of miles away from each other, and we’re both probably commitment-phobes. However, I think we’re both changing – I am anyway – and all this in and out, on and off, is getting tiring. At the moment, we’re not together, but as usual, that will change – next week or next month… Do you think this has any future of growing into something more consistent, or would you suggest I let him go and move on?

Psychic Red ext. 9226 Responds:

Dear Christina,

There is a very bright and strong bond that you and this man share. A little karma, a little convenience and a little destiny. It really does seem challenging for each of you not to reconnect with the other, but the on-and-off pattern that has been established appears as if it’s going to repeat.

One of the big challenges that stands between the two of you is timing. Currently, you’re more open to, and desiring of, a stabilized and traditional relationship than he is. When he thinks of “settling down,” he does envision it with you. However, this is not a concept he’s planning to embrace for several more years, which is likely to feed the embers conflict you already have smoldering within you.

Complicated as things may feel, it doesn’t seem as if you’re under any pressure to make a permanent decision regarding this man and his place in your life – at least not at this time. This is something that simply needs to “play out.” Deciding to move on would not/will not expel him from your system. That, and the fact that you haven’t met anyone who is remotely as interesting or desirable, helps to keep the bond the two of you have created somewhat firmly in place. So, while letting go may seem like a sound, logical plan – it is not without flaw. There is more to come between the two of you before you can make any deciding judgments.

While so many people go through life hoping to connect with one person who is a true soulmate or on a soulmate level, you’re blessed (or cursed) with having two. There is another man who will be entering your life, what looks like late in the fall of next year, with whom you will immediately connect and feel bonded to. This most certainly is going to shake things up, but who you spend the next chapter of your life with will be up to you. Your old love will not want to lose you, but he’s still going to be hesitant to solidify the relationship. Your new love is ready for a more permanent arrangement and is likely to pressure you a bit to toward exclusivity.

I see you feeling caught in the middle of these two men, and you will struggle with the pros and cons of each man and relationship. But, from what I’m seeing, it looks as if you will begin to let go of the past and your lover, and embrace a future with this new man who is obviously head over heels in love with you.

Bright Blessings,

Red

Do you have a question for Red? Ask Red your question now.