Get Good With the Folks
So, you’ve landed the guy, and you’re crazy about him, but his parents have yet to accept you into the friendly family fold. Here are a few tips on how to convert that chilly reception to something warm and welcoming.
1. Presentation
Dressing the part can go a long way towards gaining his parents’ respect. Whatever activity you have planned together, dress accordingly. Just as clothes that are too tight or too low cut can seem “trampy,” overdressing or dressing too conservatively can seem uppity or overly conservative.
2. Appreciation
Graciousness is a quality that everyone can appreciate and admire in others. Whether you’re thanking them for hosting a dinner, or sharing an evening out, showing appreciation and gratitude displays a thoughtfulness and good breeding that will be hard to resist.
3. Education
Do your homework regarding his parents. Ask your beau as many questions as necessary until you feel like you have a handle on his parent’s lives, work, and interests. Everyone likes to talk about themselves, and if you are aware of and show respect for what’s going on in his family, they are bound to be touched by how much you care.
4. Conversation
Use that new knowledge to stimulate conversation. Not only can you talk about their interests, but sharing yours with them invites them to build a closer group connection to you. Through animated discussion, you can get to know and understand one another on a deeper level.
5. Inspiration
While the jury may still be out on you, it’s a given that they love their son, and naturally want what’s best for him. Making his parents aware of your positive impact on his life- through your love, support, and inspiration, is a sure-fire method for melting even the frostiest disposition.
6. Adaptation
So perhaps you haven’t put your best foot forward with his parents to date. Different personalities and different lifestyles can make for challenging personal connections. If you just can’t seem to connect with his parents, try switching tactics – such as bringing up other topics of discussion, and allowing them to guide the conversation. Using your intuition, consider carefully what may be alienating them from you. For example, if they aren’t as comfortable with PDA, don’t invade their personal space or hang all over their son during your time together.
Winning over his parents’ hearts can be a huge challenge, and you simply do not know where they’re coming from unless you do the detective work. Whether it’s a past favored girlfriend on their minds, a miscommunication, or a test they insist on putting you through, keep in mind these guidelines, and follow your heart – it led you to him, and eventually his family will come around.
6 thoughts on “6 Ways to Win Over His Hard to Impress Parents”
HI Miss Krystal and Nelly Gold !!!
Yes, I can look back now and chuckle about that disasterous dinner….my husband was born under the sign of Leo…..
…..the more my daughter’s date talked that night, the redder in the face my husband turned. By the time my husband stood up, at the dinner table, I thought his head was going to ignite and combust into flames !!!!! To say my husband was angry that night is a gross understatement…LOL !
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500
oh goodness sorry for typos
Gina Rose, you make me lol
I enjoyed reading your response. I totally agree, avoid political all the way!
My mom always told me, “Keep your mouth shut and don’t ask questions, just answer them with grace” lol . She said says say as little as possible– the least you say, the better. Granny, on the other hand, offered different advice, yet, both mom and granny said never walk in empty handed-Granny said to help in the kitchen, and don’t offer but just start helping!
I really liked this article. These are great reasons to call a psychic.
Thanks. Miss Krystal
Hi Gina Rose; I love your contribution; especially, where you said. The parent’s primary interest is this : Are you an ASSET or a LIABILITY/BURDEN for their child…..will you help IMPROVE their Child’s QUALITIES LIFE or will you DRAG their child DOWN with you???. And I’m not speaking about only financial happiness, I’m talking about overall QUALITIES of LIFE. Nice article though; at least i’ve got some strategies, on how to meet my dude parent when the time come lol
Oh yeah, one more thing …don’t talk politics…..at all !!!!! until you know what their views are .
One time, during the Persian Gulf War, my husband & I wanted to get to know my daughter’s date a bit better ,so we invited him home for dinner…..
… at the beginning of the dinner, all was ok until her date started discussing the war with my daughter. Her date went on & on & on about how he would not fight even if the military draft was invoked again, how he was opposed to the fighting in Gulf, etc…. and my daughter then spoke up and announced that she would serve our country if need be.
My husband actually stood up at the dinner table, red faced and ANGRY and said ” What a sad day in this country when the men won’t serve the country and the women will ” . Dinner was OVER right then and there !!!!
Little did her date know that that my husband was VietNam Vet, that saw heavy action and fighting in VietNam and came from a military family of all retired Air Force Vets. We never saw that guy again, and neither did my daughter.
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500
Hi ,
Nice article…..
I also would add ( on to tip #1 ) polite manners, whether it’s table manners, saying please and thank you, not interrupting if his parents are speaking, OR interrupting your boyfriend/girlfriend when he or she speaks around the parents. NEVER argue, or disagree, with your loved one in front of his/her parents….never.
Parents will watching to see how you treat their son/daughter first and foremost ,and THEN , how you respond to them.
The parent’s primary interest is this : Are you an asset or a liability/burden for their child…..will you help improve their childs quality of life or will you drag their child down with you. And I’m not speaking about only financial happiness, I’m talking about overall quality of life.
When my daughter was young and dating,even after she turned 18 yrs old, I always watched to see if her date opened car doors , or any other doors, came to the door to pick her up, ( as opposed to her running out to the car to jump in and go).
In general, did he show her respect and courtesy (?) and also to us, her parents, as well.
LOL….my husband, ( then a active FBI agent) ,noticed whether he extended his hand to shake hands, and if he looked him in the eye when he shook hands ,and what type of handshake he had….whether his handshake was flabby and weak vs firm gripped. LOL….
( I’m surprised my hubby never cleaned his service revolver in front of my daughter’s dates as well )…..LOL
Even if you are a woman meeting his parents, know how to greet them and shake hands.
AND…if his/her Mom is cooking and playing host, offer to help with the clearing of the table dishes, etc…. you get the idea.
Just some useful tips….
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500