Confessions From a Dating Expert

Make the Connection, Get the Guy

Here at Get the Guy, I’m often asked to divulge the “secrets” to dating and relationships, the magic tips that will allow you to attract that guy you have your eye on or take your relationship to the next level. I wouldn’t say that there is a singular Holy Grail of dating advice that automatically leads to success, but I do have some invaluable rules of dating that hold the key to my expertise that I’m willing to share with you now…

You won’t find the guy you want to be with until you are the person you want to be.

Many clients come to me at a loss as to why they haven’t found the right man. They are making the effort and putting themselves out there, but are still coming up short. They have all the know-how when it comes to dating, but as soon as I investigate the other areas of their life, the problem becomes clear…

Not only are you more likely to be attractive to others when you are reaching your full life potential, but you’re also more likely to be happy in your relationship if you are succeeding in ALL areas of your life. Get personalized advice, contact a psychic today!

To aid your search in finding the right guy or to be happy enough with yourself to fall in love with the guy you have already found, it’s important to first be living your life to its full potential.

If you’re being proactive, spontaneous and ambitious in your everyday living, you will not only be more interesting and attractive to others, but you will feel satisfied and settled enough to fall in love.

If you’re not happy in your job, social life, well-being, etc., then you won’t be giving off a positive vibe to potential “suitors,” and if you have already found someone, then they won’t be enough to make you happy if you aren’t feeling settled in other areas of your life.

Stop putting off those things you are meaning to do and achieve. Make an effort to look after yourself physically and seize all the opportunities life offers you. Trust me, once you are happy in the other areas of your life, the love of your life will follow shortly after.

Stop looking in the same place and expecting to find a different caliber of guy, the BIGGEST setback for women trying to find dates is that they won’t step out of their comfort zone when it comes to searching for a guy!

A major hindrance to you finding love with the right guy might be a refusal to go the extra mile or step out of your comfort zone when it comes to the “type” of guy you want to be with. Haven’t found the guy of your dreams yet? Shocked he hasn’t stepped into the same bar you go to every Friday night? Go somewhere else! It’s time to start approaching men everywhere, book shops, cafes, museums! Different environment = different caliber of guy.

From when we first start dating, it seems we condition ourselves to date people within our circle of contact, be it people we meet through friends, education or work and most typically in a bar at the weekend. Don’t be afraid to take a chance on someone you have no previous connections or ties with or to approach someone outside of an evening social environment.

Women can often put off approaching a guy they like because they are not the usual “type” they go for and are worried they won’t have anything in common even though there is an attraction.

This isn’t about settling for someone who doesn’t meet all your expectations but about being flexible with your expectations so you will take a chance on someone different to who you’re used to spending your time with.

Another factor that can hold women back from meeting the right guy can be convenience. Don’t write off a guy just because he has a job that means he travels a lot or because he lives further away then you’re used to. Making extra effort for a guy worth your time could mean you’re a lot happier then settling for the guy that makes for a simpler, more convenient relationship.

When it comes to making a relationship work, you really only need to remember one word… BALANCE

In a relationship, some women in the first flushes of love are so determined to keep their man happy that they sacrifice too much in other areas of their lives, while others may be so conscious that they have to maintain their independence and prove that they are a “modern woman” that they refuse to make any sacrifices.

Here it’s important to find a balance. The novelty of a girlfriend who is at his every beck and call and loses her own interests and social life will wear thin very quickly.

The fact that you have your own ambitions and interests will be part of what he found attractive in the first place so don’t give up your life in order to play the role of what you think is the “perfect devoted girlfriend.”

Keep him on his toes a little, and the attraction will stay. Keeping your hobbies and interests despite the fact that it takes away some of your time with him will keep you a happy, well-rounded person and will keep him interested!

On the other end of the scale, there’s no shame in pandering to your man now and then in the same way he will do for you! Cooking him dinner or bringing him a cup of tea when he has had a long day won’t automatically transport you into the 1950s! Yes, men like knowing that they can look after their girlfriends, but it works the other way around as well.

Showing him that you are thoughtful and care about him is a lot more attractive then acting hard to please and selfish.

So you see — the expertise of dating doesn’t come from game playing or the gift of the gab, but from these simple rules of balance for living your life by, expanding your horizons and remembering that the quality of your life directly affects your relationships.

The sooner you apply these concepts to your life, the sooner your social life will transform into an active dating life with a real chance of finding the guy of your dreams every time you step out of the house.

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