Sex Q&A: Clear Up Sexual Confusion

This reader wants to know how to move forward with being bisexual and not have to feel society’s projection of guilt and shame. Liam says to get away from any influence that fosters your guilt. Start hanging with gay people and those who are supportive of their lifestyle.

Ignore Social Programming and Uncover Your Real Self

Bettie from Waterbury, Connecticut asks:

Hello, I am sexually conflicted! As a little girl I was attracted to the opposite sex. I’m beginning to understand that inhibitions and sexual limitations are artificially beat into our psyche by “society” via “religion.” How do I move forward with my sexuality, which I have discovered is bisexual in nature, and not feel guilt and shame?

Liam’s Response:

Greetings, Bettie. Let me start out by saying how proud I am to hear the degree of self-awareness you are nurturing. It takes an enormous amount of courage to break with the established patterns of a programmed identity. The methods of warping and molding you refer to are extremely powerful. They hijack endocrine responses in an attempt to override natural imprints and create new ones, relying heavily on social pressure to accomplish this goal. These methods are in no way “unnatural” nor are they somehow against your “true self.” They are based on our instinct for personal survival which is the reason we play social games to begin with.

But what is often more potent than the tactics of Sunday school teachers and kind old grandmas everywhere, are the very primal sexually charged elements of our core structure. A good deal of it is simple genetic pre-disposition, supplemented with heavy early-life doses of hormonal/experience imprinting… Or so goes most lines of thought on the subject. Our religions are nothing more than forms of tribal structure and they aren’t the only power groups in history that have had an interest in usurping natural desire in order to fulfill some other agenda. What matters now is that we get your operating system running in a mode of expression that makes you comfortable. Don’t be so down on inner conflict. Conflict fuels life. It drives all creativity. Without it we would never find much by way of illumination.

The question of relieving guilt and shame goes to the heart of many schools of psychology, modern theologies and even new age thought. It is a favorite topic of some of those religious groups you mention, because it’s all about control. Those who manage to control the neural imprinting of our psyches own the show. And control of sexuality tops the list of items that bestow optimal power over the herd. Unfortunately, attempting to control sexual impulse is playing with fire on the most brutal level. To do it, various methods of repression must be implemented and the urge to break free has become a multi-billion dollar industry. Unfortunately, almost all methods you will read about are utterly worthless. There are extreme measures by which we know neural patterns can be realigned… a process the great Terrence McKenna referred to as “clearing the hard drive.” But these ego-erasing methods are shamanic in nature and involve dangerous, socially unacceptable and often illegal methods to get the job done. Ego death is the surest way to realign neural pathways, just ask anyone who’s had a near death experience. Fortunately there are other, less extreme methods you can try that might be helpful to you over time.

Understanding and unleashing the wildness within is easier than you might think. Finding safe, self-positive ways to break social taboos and indulging in counter-ego tactics works well. Another useful tool to nurture a positive outlook on your new life is very simple: get away from any influence that fosters your guilt. Start hanging with gay people and those who are supportive of their lifestyle. And one more very important thing: Stop being so hard on the part of your personality that feels all this guilt. It was created, and it does exist. No matter what anybody tells you about being able to release it and move on, the fact is it will always be part of you. To repress it will only be counter-productive later on. I mean, who wants to do all this work only to have a backlash where you end up sending tons of money to televangelists and making speeches against the evils of homosexuality? Don’t laugh. It happens. You must always acknowledge this aspect of your Self, just try to do so by concentrating on the positive things you’ve learned from it. Most of all, be proud of yourself. You just made a declaration of your own independence here, and that’s a powerful thing. Good luck.

Liam

Do you have a question for Liam? Ask Liam your question now.

Exclusive offer: New customers can speak to a psychic for ONLY $1 per minute. Select your psychic advisor here.