Not Getting What You Want is Good for You

You Want More, You Need Less

You may want more, but you actually need less. Don’t let “wanting” take over your whole life. Stay in control of your desires by budgeting, prioritizing and shopping around. In addition, make sure that getting what you want isn’t just distracting you from what is truly important in your life. Here are some big ideas about “wanting” that will help you figure out what it is that you truly desire:

1. Not Getting What You Want is Good

When we get everything we want, we may become spoiled, lazy, ungrateful or needy. This is why it may be good not to get everything you want. Savor and appreciate the things you do get. In the book The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas Stanley and William Danko, the authors even say that the best thing you can do for your children to make sure they become financially successful adults it to not give them an allowance. Have your children always work for the things that they get so they learn that wanting things and getting things requires diligence, planning and dedication.

2. Wants are Endless

It is in our human nature to want, so we must make it second nature to curtail our wants. With that said, don’t stop wanting but also don’t give in to every impulse. Know that wanting is a good thing, but it can get out of control if you don’t wise up and think above and beyond your immediate desires. The state of wanting never disappears; we just learn to manage it successfully.

3. Budgeting Your Wants is Key

What we want is often out of our price range. That is why it remains as a “want” as opposed to something we get, hold and cherish. Be realistic about your wants and then make realistic plans for obtaining these things in ways that won’t lead to other unnecessary sacrifices. I advise you make a monthly savings budget so that you don’t break the bank. Whether you are saving for your first home or a pair of shoes, save a specific amount of money each month toward your goal.

4. Space Out and Prioritize Your Wants

If you want a lot of things, keep track of them on a list. For example, I keep track of my wants via Amazon’s “Wishlist” feature. Once you know what you are wanting, you can decide what is most important to get first and what can wait for later. Come up with a plan like purchasing one want a month and perhaps one expensive want every year. This gives you something to work toward and look forward to on a regular basis.

5. Remember Your Second Place Wants

Sometimes, the things we want are just too far out of our reach. For example, I would love to go to Korea, but that is way out of my price range, so I would be content to go to Hawaii or Texas, which are other places I’d love to visit some day. Ultimately, what I desire is a vacation, so it’s okay to choose your second or third choice if it will cost you less and allow you to afford other wants.

6. Shop Around for Your Wants

Always shop around for the best prices and deals. Use coupons, discounts, and sales as much as possible. But, before you even step foot in a store, do a thorough search of your home, garage, and storage areas to see if you already own something that you can reuse or transform into what you want! As a bonus, this is a more eco-friendly way to shop.

7. Wanting May Be a Distraction

Some distractions can be healthy such as exercise, cleaning or reading. However, some distractions can have a negative affect on your life, such as shopping, gambling and drinking. Make sure that the things you want to have or do are things that will help you become the person you wish to be. Don’t let “wants” steer you off your path to success.

“Whether you want a job, a house, a friend, a mate, lead with your strengths.” – Psychic Reed ext. 5105

Once we get what we want, then what? Well, typically, we move on to wanting something else. So, challenge yourself to really appreciate things for a longer stretch of time before moving on to the next item on your wish list. Even better, see if you can find joy in wanting and not getting. After all, these are the situations and experiences that make us more resourceful, resilient and interesting.

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