Red Responds: She’s Not Good With Money

Dear Red,

I’m not sure where to start. I guess the number one issue that is bothering me is my financial status. I know I’m not good with money and I never was. But when my dad helped me get a house I thought I would be able to do it. My uncle moved in and we were helping each other out with rent. Then my aunt moved in and things were just great. Well my child support was cut in half this year, my uncle moved out on his own and now my aunt is going back with her boyfriend. Do you see me making it on my own? Between my job and the child support will I be able to support my kids, this household and myself?

I have a wonderful boyfriend but because he isn’t divorced from his wife yet, there are issues there as well. I do love him and I know that he loves me just as much. My kids have told him that he should move in with us, my brother has even brought up the subject. I did as well, once. But all I got was “I’ll consider it.”

I just don’t know what direction to go. I’m confused and concerned I’m not going to be able to make it. PLEASE HELP!

Valentina in Denver

Dear Valentina,

The easy answer to your financial question is: yes. BUT it isn’t going to be easy. Knowing that you aren’t the best with money management is good, but don’t hide behind that as an excuse. You’ve got people around you that love you a great deal, and have really extended themselves to help you out. It is your turn to repay them with thanks by taking responsibility for your finances.

The first thing you need to do is make a budget. I would advise you to have someone help you with this. That outside, objective wisdom and opinion will help you out a lot, since some sacrifices will have to be made. I’m not trying to insult your intelligence, because you could make a budget on your own, but you seem to get a bit overwhelmed with the where’s and how’s of living within the boundaries of the money you have available. I’m not sure who this man is that is helping you create a budget, but he is older with very little gray in his short, curly, dark hair. He may be a relative or very close friend; because his helping you is a favor, not a service. Once you have the budget on paper, STICK TO IT, and it will keep you out of trouble.

I do see you on your own for a while. Things would be a lot easier for you if your boyfriend were to move in, but he’s not ready for that just yet. You seem to have a really good relationship with him, and I would suggest that you and your family not pressure him to move in. Seems like there’s a life lesson in here for you to know that you can make it on your own. Ironically, it is after you understand that you are self-sufficient, I see you looking for a roommate to share expenses with. It is not because you are in financial trouble, but because you desire a little more financial freedom. It is at that time, when you tell your boyfriend that you are going to place an ad for a roommate that he will suggest that you consider him instead!

It’s funny how everything falls into place when we are doing what we are supposed to do…

Brightest Blessings,
Red
Ext. 9226