You can’t always get what you want… or so the song says. Surprisingly enough however, the Rolling Stones had it right. While you may have your sights set on something (or someone) that doesn’t wind up coming your way, the universe, in its infinite wisdom, will give you what you need. More importantly, if you choose to accept it, you may find what you got to be a whole lot more satisfying than what you were after in the first place!
It’s All By Design… Yours!
There may or may not be an actual reason for things when they happen. What definitely exists, however, is a lesson. Sure, it hurts when you don’t get what you want – especially if you wanted it really, really, badly. Since love is our innermost drive, the heartache multiplies when the desire was for another human being. The trouble is, regardless of what we’ve “lost out on,” we often focus so much of our attention on the object of our desire (personal, professional or romantic), that we lose track of why we actually wanted it. What needs were we looking to fulfill? How were we going about getting them met? Therein lies the gold.
If you can step aside from your disappointment and analyze two things: your motivations and how you went about pursuing your goal, you’ll unlock the mystery of your situation – and be able to grow as a result. For instance, you didn’t get the job you wanted. Look closely and you may see that you only wanted it because it would improve your standing in the eyes of your parents or friends. So your goal was misguided. Maybe it’s more important to find a path that would satisfy you on a deeper level.
Or perhaps you’re devastated by “the one who got away.” Are you pining for a solid and fulfilling partnership, or have you convinced yourself your mate was the veritable definition of perfection while selling your own needs short? Odds are, you had good intentions – love. But your process (projection) was all wrong. Mr./Ms. Right will not be perfect. Nor will he or she get away – the two of you will be equally committed to working things out. On the other hand, Mr./Ms. Right Now comes to show you how to be your best you in a relationship. And they’ll keep on coming until you’ve got it figured out! On that note, this your chance to…
Learn to Read the Signs
The benefit of 20/20 hindsight is that you can look back with clear eyes to uncover signs you may have missed along the way to your recent disappointment. If you’re like most people, you’ll find that deep down, you knew this would happen – or at least had an inkling that something was amiss. Going forward, make it a point to enter into your pursuits with open eyes and clear intentions. The universe will guide you toward your own highest good as long as you’re an active (and engaged) participant in achieving it!
9 thoughts on “Uncovering Alchemy in Disappointment”
But what do you do when you look and can’t find your motivations, or what you did wrong but the negative keeps coming at you?
Your article was truly spot on! I agree that every disapointment, hearbreak or failure has some lesson available for our own growth or path. When I find myself or see my friends going through something, I will ask “what is the message?” or “what am I or you missing?” Thanks for a great and timely article. I am going forward to a young friend of mine.
Thank you,
purplelotus
I know that this message is for me from the Universe. I loved a couple of my very dear gentlemen friends and they both are disappearing on me. All I know is that I gave them pure love. I cannot understand why they decided to leave. I keep asking the universe why. Noting happened. No argument or disagreement or wrong comments. It was all loving relationship. No pressure of any kind for any commitment of any kind. It was friendship. I cannot understand why.
A few years ago one of my school girl friends who was so close to me disappeared. She passed the Bar exam and then no news. I contacted her several times and she said that she was busy and that ended the relationship and up to this date I am not sure what happened. I ask the universe “What did I do wrong”? I only gave them pure pure love. No expectation. I am sure of that. Then what happened.
I need to find out why people who I love so much left me.
Please help me more…..
Thank you for this article. It’s helped a lot in my journey to get over my husband (soon to be ex) just by reading it. I know the universe will always give us what we need, not always what we want. What struck me was the comment that “the one that got away” wouldn’t “get away” if he were my true life mate. I’ve been in that spot of thinking no one better will come along. Fortunately, that way of thinking is in the past. For as much as I’ve pined over the loss of this relationship, still, I know there is somebody out there for me. (I could use an article on finding that “someone.”)
Talk about signs !!! I was quite taken back when I logged on today and saw this. My life is so driven by signs, it can be quite astounding at times. Once you step back and watch, there is so much that unfolds before your very eyes.
Today, I am pondering on an issue with a male friend – he wants to be more than friends, but I hold him back. My intuition is saying he is not ready, nor am I. Partly because there is another lady he is involved with, who is very much a stalker and control freak… hence I feel it would not be safe for me.
I often talk to the universe and ask for a sign… should I wait, stay, go…. and still the signs keep telling me to hang in there !!! (god its painful !!) so I do….
Todays signs were even stronger than ever…. I was on a long car drive today – I was looking out the window on the journey – thinking will this woman ever go away and let us start our relationship properly. Then one by one, as I passed each road sign, a message started to come out – it literally read a whole sentence by the time I reached the traffic lights. The essence of the message, was to wait, it wont be long now, she will be gone and my time is coming.
To say I was speechless would be an understatement…
Many times I look back over my life, and realised the situation I was in with my man friend, had repeated itself 3 times already with the same type of woman. In the week I changed my thought process on blocking this man out and being angry at these woman. I dont want this sort of feeling. So in my vision, I gave this man a key – it was the key to my heart. If he wants to unlock it I now give him permission. Then the other lady, smiled and walked away. I was at total peace in my heart and feelings for this man now – not the wishful, romantic type of love – but pure with total compassion.
I did wonder if now, the universe has spoken back to me to let me know if I really have learned the lesson. but time will tell now… I will wait and see.
Yes, signs are really powerful things – just need to learn to read them
Hugs xxxx
Its a blessing if you cannot get what you want sometimes as in time you will see it is usually a gift especially if you have infatuations with people and can’t get them. Its meant to be, even though it can be painful at the time
Best Wishes Pat Ilott
Hi,
I’ve learned not to question the obstacles thrown into my path……but to view them as lessons to be learned…..challenges and fears to conquer and overcome.
When I died and crossed over twice….it was revealed to me on the other side, that we all choose our life path obstacles before we incarnate, so…..simply put….. I’ve chosen these lessons aforehand because it was something I needed to go thru and experience and thus, learn and grow from.
As a result of dying twice, I tend to view things from a larger scape…..an overall Karmic view…..as in when I cross over to stay and look back…what did I learn ?
Hello S.K. Smith,
I enjoyed and agree with your article, usually when you are in the middle of changes with-in your life, many times it is so difficult to see that there is something better to come that will bring greater happiness, as I say sometimes its harder to see the tree’s through the forest.
Blessings and Big Hugs!
Jacqueline x9472
You are absolutely right! I learn and grow with each situation and experience in my life. Esp. if it didn’t turn out the way I had hoped. I also agree that the Universe does have better things coming your way and will guide you, if you are open and use that 20/20 insight/lessons in your life each time. Looking back and being honest about your motivation and acknowledging the ‘signs’ or intuitions that you didn’t listen to, also helps us grown and learn. Figuring out what we really want and letting the Universe give us what we need, like you said ‘with it’s infinite wisdom’!
Great post! It almost took be back when I saw this post, because I so needed to read this today! Then I realize that it was the Universe that put this article in your heart & brought me to this page today!
Blessings & Many Hugs,
Coreen @ VOS