The top 11 things never to say to a man include comparisons, hating things he loves, physical criticisms, snooping, ultimatums and more. Read-on to find out the rest!
Don’t Do It or You’re Never Gonna Get It!
If communicating with your guy feels like pulling thread through a brick wall, don’t let your frustration turn that needle into a bazooka cannon. A man’s exterior is not as sturdy as it may appear, and it doesn’t take much to crumble the foundation from his ego. To help keep your guy’s manhood intact, please avoid these 11 all-too-common, yet hurtful phrases.
1. “You’re just like…”
Unless you are about to compare your guy to John Wayne, it is probably best to drop these words at the starting line. Guys are never too keen on being compared to other guys, especially when it involves a cantankerous father, deadbeat friend, or your ex. Get personalized advice from a psychic!
2. “I hate your (friend, mom, dog, etc.)”
Hate is a pretty strong word, and saying “I can’t stand…” is not much better. If someone in your man’s life is a vile of snake poison, let him figure that out for himself. Complaining about them, will only draw him closer to their corner, and farther from your own.
3. “I can’t wait to see what you do for my birthday”
Guys hate feeling pressured to perform, whether it is in bed, on the job, or for your birthday party. Expectation can be a dirty word in relationships. Being overly obsessed with one grand gesture can make you blind to the little things your guy does for you every day.
4. “You’re going bald”
He’s probably batted these words around in his head, as many times as you’ve scolded yourself about your weight. However, if he had been the one to mention it, you would have scratched his eyeballs out. Subtlety is key when discussing a topic that may be sensitive to a man. If you really want to help him, make a casual suggestion, and leave the follow-through to his own discretion.
5. “The garage door is broken, so I asked my dad if he could fix it”
You might as well call the cable guy to see if he can help with your guy’s erectile problems, because that is about as emasculating as asking your dad to take care of you. Guys like to be the knight in shining armor for their damsel. If he decides to call your dad for help, let it come from his mouth, not yours.
“The only person you can change is yourself. Learn to accept others as they are or move on.” – Rivers ext. 5273
6. “(Insert your friends name) is cheating on…”
Guys are trusting, but the minute he believes that you are hanging around someone who is a bad influence, he may start suspecting that your part in the story may not be so innocent. Before bringing up the adulterous shenanigans of one of your friends, make sure that your guy understands your disappointment in her actions.
7. “Be a man!”
This is the same as tying a rock around his testicles, and sinking them to the bottom of the Atlantic. There is nothing more degrading to a guy than having his manhood questioned. If you are wanting your guy to show some backbone in a tough situation, there are better ways to inspire him, rather than torching whatever masculinity he has left.
8. “I was reading through your e-mails/texts…”
Men value their privacy, and so should you. No matter what your reasoning is for looking through his stuff, if you mistrust him enough to damage his trust with the relationship, you should save yourself the trouble, pack his bags, and leave them at the curb.
9. Listen to me!”
He hears you! He is probably wondering why you can’t find a better way to talk, so that he can understand you. Guys hate to be scolded about their inability to communicate. This is a stereotype that has done a lot of injustice to the guys who are doing their best to work around these low expectations.
10. “Talk to me!”
Guys have a hard enough time sorting out their emotions, and when you put him on the spot, he is almost guaranteed to freeze up. This will only make you angrier, and him more frustrated. It is okay to ask him important questions. However, give him enough time to gather his thoughts before he answers.
11. “This is your last chance”
This is the kind of pressure put on men that has defeat written all over it. This threat rarely gives women the result that was intended. This unfortunately only succeeds at scaring a guy enough to do something rash and stupid, like having your face tattooed on his forearm.
“Keep your partner happy by being happy yourself.” – Blythe ext. 5339
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46 thoughts on “11 Things to Never Say to a Man”
The advice about communicating with “your man ” is very helpful – and true from my personal experience . As mom of 4 grown sons and a wife of a second husband who has 3 sons I can tell you men are most definitely different . However so all human beings , so I believe you have love yourself and try to understand how to care yourself before you enter any relationship . I do think this advise is certainly helpful .
Describing or decoding what’s really going on when you say certain things to a a man is like bringing up a child. You have to mind your manners–so-to-speak. It seems you have to be very careful of what you say to them or they’ll break in half. I think it’s better if men would cry out loud instead of trying to disguise their feelings by holding them inside. Maybe then they could handle what a woman or a partner relates to them verbally. For a man to display all of that machoism on the outside, he’s really very fragile on the inside based on this article.
better to attracted the right one…man is never enough…when come to the one. Its said , take two to tango. Silent and invisible all the time, better not to hv a relation. Work out or break up..if they not belonging to us. Ofcos nobody can change nobody in our life, but change for better outcome…
This article is stating the true part of women who are not prepared to be married.
All this 11 points tell me that men a afraid of being told the truth about their weaknesses, they like to be superior and they like to be treated like kings. I like this article, wish all females had access to read it coz they need to know these
good advise but if men would do what they suppose to and listen more attentively then some of those remarks would never come up. women like a do it yourself man she does not need to have a man who is not even willing to try thats why they get the phrase “just like”. or when he is suspected of scheming then he gets the phrase” i hear joe is cheating” i would not read his e-mails but if he hears this is your last chance then its to make him do better and if he doesnt then its time to leave. we need to look at what a woman does not need to hear.
WHY IS IT THAT ALL THE WOMEN WANT TO CHANGE MEN ? ALL THE TIME I HEAR WOMEN SAYING. ‘OH WE CANNOT CHANGE THEM ‘ DO WE WANT THEM TO BE LIKE US , THAT IS LIKE A WOMAN? MEN ARE MADE DIFFERENT & WOMEN ARE MADE DIFFERENT . LET MEN BE MEN & IF WE DONT WANT TO CHANG LET US NOT WANT THEM TO CHANGE ….s R
Why is it that all women want to change the men ? Do they want men to be like them , that is like women? I always hear woman say ,’ we cannot change them ‘ Sure we cannot . By birth & nature women & men are different .. Let men be men .. .. SR
Why can’t we all just get along? (haha)
yes i realized this
I believe that this info on men is true, but to be honest most men have a vice that they can not be with out, so ladies use it to ur advantage. For example if ur man lives for a home cooked dinner or even a bj everyonce in a while, the trade, u will do more then spouting out harsh words or degrating the manhood of ur guy.
These are very good but it would have been nice to have some positive examples in there place as well.
These are ALL excellent !!!!!!
Well done, Eric !
please i want to call psychics but i cant get thru maybe of the numbers,am in zimbabwe what can i do?
thanks for make me understand
Thanks Eric, such a useful article.
Although I’ve never said any of these things to my boyfriend, this was pretty good advice!
thanks for sharing ,i have learn alot .
i do agree with all that was written about not saying certain things to a man. my awareness comes from common sense, sensitivity, and experience!
kristini u were great n i will be back for more of ur feedback u made me even more a believer this was my first time ever having a reading thank u so much
so true and thank you
I am 42, single mother of two children. I was having a great relationship with a man, 50 unhappily married, since last 3 years – he chased me day and night for months, convinced me to first become a friend, then a beloved, showered me with love, care, attachment and friendship for last few years. Then something went wrong; he seemed to feel threatened to lose his reputation and family that his wife had come to doubt about our relationship. For last 3 months he had totally stopped talking to me.
I was dead serious about this relationship and him; knew that it has no future, but still wanted to keep it. I am going through unbelievable pain and suffering.
He is short-tempered and unpredictable; in past he has fought with me several times, stopped talking to me but everytime he came back with the same passion and sincerity. But this time it’s been 3 months, and he has totally stopped all communication with me.
Will he ever come back? I am ready to do anything to bring him and our friendship back.
Please help me.
Aditi
Good advice…
These are very honest and great comments to all women and men , as it goes both ways and relationships should be respected as much as those involved within the relationship and not judged by past doings or the lack of doings. Instead try working and value the relationship . I am a great believer that you have to accept oneself and love oneself before you can give or recieve the above .
I arthur rene castro love for j.j. of the tamarack knows no bounds. sssso ha ha!!!!!
is there any one who can bring my lover back to me again??is any magic change possible?
I have communicating with a gentlemen for over 3 1/2 years. I work in a grocery store. He always comes to me and speaks to me. I try to ignore him and he still comes to me. I fell in love with him, and i ask him out for dinner. He said sure and that he was sick, he really was I gave him my business card. He didn’t phone me and I did see him again and I made him wait for his order because I had other customers. I didn’t feel the energy that I usually did. I ask if he was better he said yes, i said you didn’t get a flu shot he said no? I ask him his name and he said it was a secret? Why would someone tell me all this stuff in terms of monetary things? I don’t understand. Flirt, player. It is working real well because i am starting to take care of myself, i dropped 20 pounds, and I feel really happy. I don’t understand. My heart is already broken from my former husband, i haven’t been in a relationship in over 16 years. I rather not be hurt and put up with abuse.
I am wondering if my bf Rick is not attracted to me anymore? That spark and spontaety he once has is gone. When I ask him how he feels bout me he gets angry and defensive and tell me I should know how he feels. I havent heard or felt that love for a very long time. I know hes going thru some rough health issues, but I feel I shouldnt be called a drama queen. Its just nice to hear that u matter. Frustrated and questioning whether I should stay or go?
Good advice, but sometimes men give women reasons to say certain things they do not want to hear. Some Men needs to grow up and we do not expect perfection. When you are in a relationship you can not be invisible…communicate with your partner.
You are right on with all of those comments. No wonder I divorced my ex.
A GUY most times is not listening to you anyway.
A MAN has problems just like you and everyone else.
1. “You’re just like… (Insert foot here)”
Unless you compare men to someone positive, you are offering an insult.
Guys don’t like being compared to other guys,
because they have low standards and don’t like it being pointed out
2. “I hate your (friend, mom, dog, etc.)”
Hate is a serious word.
If someone in a mans’ life is vile as snake poison, point it out as you would an actual snake he will appreciate it.
Complaining to guys, will only draw them closer to the offensive person,
and farther from you, which is another excuse for him to create more distance.
3. “I can’t wait to see what you do for my birthday”
Guys hate feeling pressured to perform up to any standard past changing their underwear.
Expectation is to be lived up to in life and kept alive in relationships.
Personally, I like to say: “Wow, you can’t wait?…Are you going to jump into the future?…Quick, tell me what I did, and how I could have made it better!”
4. “You’re going bald”
If he is, he is. If it’s working for him, tell him.
Subtlety is key when discussing a topic that may be sensitive to a mans’ appearance.
5. “The garage door is broken, so I asked my dad if he could fix it”
If your dad has experience, with garage doors, call him.
The last thing a man wants to do is repair something on his day off.
Your dads gets to feel useful and it gives your man a chance to work with him.
It takes half as long and creates that bonding thing.
6. “(Insert your friends name) is cheating on…”
Guys help each other do this, he doesn’t need you telling him is scumbag buddy is busted.
A man most likely knows, has already talked to his friend about it and left it up to him.
7. “Be a man!”
This is foreign language to a guy, because he thinks he IS being a man.
Asking this of a man is to trick him into doing something stupid, dangerous, or shameful.
8. “I was reading through your e-mails/texts…”
Men value their privacy, as does everyone else on the planet.
If he has given you his password, he does not care if you read his e-mails.
If you mistrust a guy enough to damage his trust with the relationship,
the joke is on you for thinking he uses the word relationship.
You should save yourself the trouble, pack his bags, and leave them at the curb.
9. “Listen to me!”
Guys hear you, they waiting for you to shut up, so he can continue watching basketball.
Men listen, but often hear key words that stay long after the conversation is over.
Guys hate to be scolded for the inability to communicate beyond slang and chest bumping.
10. “Talk to me!”
Guys have a hard time pretending to have emotions, beyond anger and depression.
To put him on the spot, guarantees anger. This will only make him depressed.
And you frustrated. It’s pointless to ask him important questions. He is NOT a man.
“talk to me” is never a phrase you need say to a man.
11. “This is your last chance”
This said to a guy is comical, as he knows you are bluffing.
If you could do better, you would not being taking his abuse.
He will laugh at you and then dismiss you. This is seen everyday in bars and malls.
This threat should be used rarely. It’s not to be a “cry wolf” fall back on move.
This fortunately only succeeds with giving a once in a lifetime, much needed wake up call.
Because men, real men sometimes need a relationship defining moment.
I don’t think anyone likes to be spoken to that way, male or female.
thank you
Not 11. Nvm x:
I must be loved because I’ve done 7,8,9,10,&11. he doesn’t usually get mad at me. c:
Will someone email me back again? Someone from Florida area? I am from Washington State. I am 4/28/45…other is: 7/4/48.
Hi it would be nice your former costomer to be granded , once while for, special price reading.
Good article. Aim good- Be good- C good
I don’t buy into this malarky.It seems “men” want to be treated like little boys.We have to walk on eggshells just to comunicate with them!? I have to fix anything that is broken around the house as he is too busy watching Football and eating junk food.But oh god help us women if we want to talk about something!!Men it seems have the predisposed right to talk or accuse women or the women in their life of whatever they want.How about writing an article on how men should treat and talk to women!?
This is a bullshit article, come on.. It’s too much to expect from a lady.. If she loves, cares, gives..it’s ok if she expects.. Each time a person can’t think and react..
Thank you, Eric. Your article is wonderful! I give this very kind of counsel to others often, and it’s most helpful that you’ve written out all the principles here so well. You’ve created another great reference tool. Much appreciated!
My man says he love me only, but sleep and sees other women. What is his problem? If he loves me why is he cheating?
Number 11 is soo true.. I did this once thinking that he will comply lol.. I was like 10 minutes or il nvr talk to u again. He nver msged me back within the 10 minutes but when we talked he told me that reading my message makes him want to piss me off more.. wrong moveee.. hehe
“the only person you can change is yourself, learn to accept others as they are or move on” FAB quote! I am learning that after years of arguments, battles, and bad feelings the answer was there all along!!! I now say to people I have no right to change you or ask you to be something or someone else, what I can do that is empowering to me is…………………. accept it or move on! makes life easier , great article.
#7 ouch!
so glad you wrote this article. plenty of wisdom here.
I love this article. so interesting and enlightening. Thank you.