Offering Insight Into Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual Relationships
For quite some time, I’ve wanted to write about the questions that some of our gay callers to California Psychics bring up. These callers may be gay, lesbian or bisexual, but all desire information or insight on their relationships.
Personally, I feel an excellent connection with these callers. I find that their questions are concise and to the point. A friend of mine, another psychic, agrees with me that gay callers are typically very clear about what they would like to know and seem very self-sufficient in their lives. It is a pleasure to speak with them.
The questions they ask deal with the matters that many of our callers are concerned with. What does the future hold for them in regards to someone they are seeing? What is the basis of the conflict they are experiencing in that relationship? Or, when will they be meeting someone new?
Most of my callers identify themselves at the very beginning as gay or bisexual. They are straightforward, wanting to save time and “cut to the chase.” Information is what they looking for.
Once in a while, I sense that there is some defensiveness when they do state that they are gay. I can well understand this, as their lives have had extra challenges. I’m sure most have had the challenge of being accepted and understood.
Additionally, there are questions that come as a result of who they are. One gentleman who called said that he had had gay relationships, but preferred very much to live as a heterosexual with a wife and children. I pointed out that he could have a partner and children but it was very important to him, he said, to appear “average.” Of course, if he had not had family and/or religious influences, he might not consider being heterosexual as “average.” And it is very hard to go against these sometimes overwhelming influences, I know.
As we spoke, I told him what possibilities I saw for him and discussed a future path. While I felt that we had a tremendous interaction, I also recommended that he seek counseling in order to determine who he felt himself to really be. We may be swayed by family and church but this does not necessarily mean we are doing what is the best for ourselves in the long run. If we live our lives as others may dictate, I believe only great unhappiness may result.
This man wanted to appear “average.” This is very understandable, as quite often society does not interact well with minorities. A saying I once came across stated “the nail that stands up gets hammered down.” And so it may seem to anyone who does not appear “average.”
But I believe that one of the most important endeavors we ever embark on in our lives is to discover who we honestly are and to not attempt to develop the path that others might have us take. We will always be dissatisfied and unhappy if we attempt to follow a path that is not our own, whether we are gay or heterosexual.
Here at California Psychics, I enjoy the variety of individuals who call. Whether they are gay, lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual, it is perpetually surprising as well as rewarding to assist people in their discovery of self. It is my hope that our readings will be beneficial to our callers in their search. I know that at the same time I, myself, will learn from our encounters.
13 thoughts on “A Psychic’s Viewpoint on Gay Relationships”
Great post Tansy,
Anything that promotes discussion, is good, Ok not everyone agrees with everything. But we are all humans, regardless of sexuality, and as such will always have bridges to cross, so much easier when we know we are not alone.
Woodsman has a valid opinion, as does everyone else, we all read the same words, but digestthem differently.I certainly hope the post is not removed or edited, I actually hope there are more posts of interest to the LGBT community, like it or not are a big part of our culture, and future.
I’m Gay I Want To Know If I Need To Stay In Closet Or Come Out Of My Life Was Started At !3 Years Old I Was Raped And To Do Enter Cores And Oriel I Now Can’t Stop I Never Ben In Bed With A Women Just Me I Need Answers.
oh yeah Jesse liked your post as well!!!!! Are you from Michigan? just curious !
I agree with Woodslover on his post that the emphasis could have been directed at the point of “Being true to oneself” as oposed to referencing the gay label or stereotype if you will. Yet I do not see much wrong with the article at all. I do beleive it would be best if wether gay or straight that we could start looking at how we treat ourselves and or eachother and such issues as acceptance are good as well -oops getting offbase. Lets see here point being be true to who you are and yes it is true that if you live your life contigent upon previous enculteration inspite of how you truly feel well then you could be opening the door to your own unhappiness and then your family and the church can set aside and happily watch as you chomp on your antidepressants and slide into the rut of ugly dispare just to make them accept you and love you for who you are not!!!WAY TO GO-Just know that it does suck not being who your true nature wishes to reveal as well as not being truly present with who you really love unless it was just about getting your clock cleaned in the first place!!
As an out and proud lesbian since the age of 16, I did not find this article offensive in any way. I appreciate Woodslover’s perspective and I agree that a different scenario might have been used to represent my tribe in a better light, but Tansy was giving a real life example that she dealt with through compassion and insight. Unfortunately, not all LGBT folks are as wonderful as we would like. The same is true with heterosexuals. In fact, far more of my clients are heterosexuals who are cheating on their spouses (or in love with someone who is cheating) than my LGBT clients.
Does that mean that straight people are of lower moral fiber than LGBT folks? Of course not! It simply means that my clientele come to me with these kinds of challenges more often than other types of issues. I believe that is where Tansy is coming from in her article: it is just her experience. No judgment call, no generalizing…just honesty and compassion.
I know that if we, as LGBT people, are ever going to experience true equality, it is going to take the support of the straight community to help us overturn the more than 1100 homophobic laws (such as DOMA, Prop 8, etc.) that keep us in the back of the bus. However, if well meaning straight folks (as well as some of the LGBT community!) keep focusing on politically correct minutia, the real issues get derailed and no progress will ever be made.
The real offering behind this article, in my opinion, is to show that all people, regardless of their sexuality, are welcome at California Psychics and that our problems are very similiar to straight people’s challenges and we should never be afraid of speaking our truths…especially not in this forum!
We all have to learn to choose our battles until this war is won. This article was well written and honest. Until the United States catches up with dozens of other countries who fully respect and include the LGBT community in all civil rights, there will continue to be those sad and lost people who will “hide” behind the appearance of being straight. Their lives will have far more pressure than if they would simply step out into the light, but their fears will keep them imprisoned. This is when they need the guidance of a gifted, compassionate psychic most of all. We are here to help lift fear from ALL people in ALL situations.
Woodslover, thank you for helping in our struggle for equality, but please don’t shoot the messengers.
Blessings of Light and Love,
Jesse 9027
Hi ,
I see both sides of the coin here……I’ve read for the gay community for decades now,…
…..AND I ALSO read for the top therapists in the country, one of them is gay and is involved with several National boards concerning Gay rights…….I ran this article by her and she saw nothing really wrong with this article except for the example reading used in this article, which is somewhat stereotypical.
This therapist and I both think Tansy gave him good advice, which is, to seek counseling …..so as this client can work these issues out to live a happier, more fullfilling life.
My own opinion, by the way, is that the REAL victims here, besides of course the man, are the wife and kids. So the sooner this individual gets counseling, the better for everybody involved……
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500
Nicely put Brian…how ever he and his wife work things out is between them. The point is BE TRUE TO WHO YOU ARE. Sometimes people get hurt and sometimes they disagree with your decision but at the end of the day you have to have self worth with who you are as a person. Cheating made it clear that he wasn’t being honest with himself or to his wife. Calling Tansy was his call for help.
Dear Tansy,
Thanks for this article. I feel it is paramount for all of us to resonate with who we really are, ‘find ourselves’, if you will, breathe in our power and own our confidence, no matter what our sexual preference. You articulated this beautifully here.
I resonate with your statement ~ “I believe that one of the most important endeavors we ever embark on in our lives is to discover who we honestly are and to not attempt to develop the path that others might have us take.” Bravo Sister!
Hard work? … in some ways you bet! … but I think it’s so much harder to live in pretense. ‘By letting go of who we are ‘not’, immediately reveals who we are’!
Great message!
Blessings, Faith ext. 9608
Dear Woodslover and Readers:
I am so sorry! I guess I was not clear at all when I wrote of the man who wanted to be “average” and hetero. His situation was not that he was married and wanting to be gay but he was single and undecided as to what status, if you will, he wanted to pursue in life. His question was regarding which path he should choose. What I saw indicated that he should pursue that which fulfilled him emotionally and that he should not conform to what he felt was “expected” of him.
Blessings,
Tansy
Ext. 5289
This is good… yes, the man broke the agreement with his wife and cheated. but he was trying to come to grips a new way of looking at himself. everyone experiences this. he may have not handled the way i would have. i know how hard it is to fit in with this hetero society, but it’s good to know that there’s someone out there that can help out. Thanks for the article, Tansy!!!
I actually liked the post a lot and I disagree with you, Woodslover. What Tansy is talking about is the fact that we all should be true to ourselves, regardless of what society attempts to force us into.
I have a ton of gay and lesbian friends and almost all of them attempted at some point in their life to be straight, because the consequences of coming out were dire. There are still plenty of areas within the US where being gay is considered a “sin,” so anyone who is actively attempting to point out that living your life up to your fullest potential, by being who you truly are, is definitely not supporting stereo types and insults.
Tansy, I agree with you! True happiness lies within being who we truly are, even if the fight to get there is difficult. The final outcome is well worth the struggle.
I don’t think this article is offensive at all. Tansy is counseling the man to get counseling to decide what he really wants, isn’t that the solution to him feeling like he needs to live a lie at the expense of his family?
I had to read this post a few times with an open mind, but I still found this to be somewhat insulting. I personally don’t believe that this article was intended to be offensive, but if you replace the term “gay” with a different type of epithet it definitely changes the whole tone.
My biggest disappointment in this post is the example used of a man who was cheating on his spouse. It seems that this scenario is often used time and time again to draw attention to the gay community and to highlight the “struggles” we face. Unfortunately, this doesn’t even touch the tip of the iceberg and just feeds into untrue stereotypes.
The reality is this, the man is going against an agreement he made with another person. It doesn’t matter to me if he is cheating with another man or woman, he is breaking an agreement he made. Let’s not focus on who he was doing it with, but the reason(s) behind it. To me, that is the real heart of the matter and I highly doubt it has much to do with sexual orientation.
If the company is hoping to expand their gay clientele, I would highly recommend editing or just removing this post all together. I believe this a case where good intentions were lost in translation. Hopefully this reply is received before more people see this and you alienate yourself from a market that is definitely underserved.