Don’t Put Your Man in a Box

Underestimating People Never Works

There is an interesting ideology entertained by certain women regarding “training your man.” While the assumption is that since men are clueless about many of women’s wants and needs, they consequently need appropriate instruction. You can see how this can easily take a wrong turn, and how demeaning to a male it can be. (To be fair, men can have a similar outlook on their mates, but in either case, this mentality converts the relationship into a nasty game.) Placing many rules and expectations on your beau sets the foundation for an unhealthy relationship and can backfire big-time. Let’s look at a few ways we can trap our guy in this proverbial box.

Criticism Central

Critiquing your guy can diminish him and the integrity of your relationship. If mates feel like no matter what they do, they will be judged and found wanting, they will eventually stop trying and lose all respect in the relationship. Focus on appreciating your partner, as this attitude can easily motivate him to be a better person, instead of making him feel resentful about your constant judgment.

Great Expectations

Placing high demands on your partner puts pressure and strain on your relationship, and is likely, again, to cause resentment. While you both may rely on one another for certain things, it is unfair for one partner to expect the moon from the other when they themselves aren’t delivering the same in the partnership. It’s important to love your partner for the whole package—faults and all. If he happens to want to change for the better because he loves you, well that’s just icing on the cake!

“Keep your partner happy by being happy yourself.” – Blythe ext. 5339

Tight Leashes

Keeping your guy on a tight leash usually ends up suffocating him, and demonstrates a lack of trust on your part. If you don’t trust your partner enough to go about his daily life without your constant meddling, you probably shouldn’t be with him. Relationships are not about controlling one another, but about exploring life together and being able to allow one another to exist independently and individually as well as a couple.

No Room to Breathe

Everyone needs their own space to live their life to the fullest, and even an outstanding couple needs their separate and individual time to do what their happiness dictates. Allowing time apart will provide perspective on why you are in love and have chosen to be a part of one another’s lives.

Have Him Pegged?

Labeling people denies them the chance to prove, or live, otherwise with you. When you project your opinions and expectations on your partner, you have already written the story. Instead of assuming you know all sides of him and all future reactions, give spontaneity a try. People can sense open-mindedness as easily as judgment. If you both feel the freedom to act openly and honestly everyday, there’s no telling how many amazing surprises may be in store for your relationship.

“The only person you can change is yourself. Learn to accept others as they are or move on.” – Rivers ext. 5273

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