Nobody understands why you can’t get over him. Your friends say, “Let it go. Move on with your life.” You know in your heart that you’re sick of missing him, but you still have that deep intuitive feeling that the two of you are supposed to be together! It’s something I hear about, a connection between lovers that was (and is) a spiritual, Soul-to-Soul connection, and yet for some reason in the mundane world, you can’t be together, and one or both of you suffer and pine for what cannot be.
One of the first things I try to explain is that when there is such a strong connection, a spiritual and soul connection, it usually means that you have shared each other’s life path in other lifetimes! So perhaps in at least one other past life, the two of you have been together for many, many years, perhaps even through entire lifetimes, even up through death. The “soul memory” of being together is something that does not simply end after each lifetime; there is a long recording of each life you’ve experienced, the loved ones in it, and all the lessons and love along the way. When there is a soul to soul connection, you can easily get stuck mourning the relationship as it ONCE was in another life!
There are some soul mates that meet after connecting or getting married to another, and although the odds are against a happily ever after, this can actually occur. If you find yourself in this situation, it’s important to hold on to your own independence, and work to stay as spiritually clear as possible. Do your meditation or prayer to stay grounded and clear in order to make the best possible choices for yourself. That connection to a higher spiritual experience is sometimes the only thing to cling to when the nights are long and you are all alone.
The most important factor to help you reclaim your life if your soulmate can’t share it with you is to remember that the “echoes” of past lives might be confusing you. If you make up your mind that it’s time to really “let go” in this lifetime, you must set a date on a calendar to release and move forward, and every day pray or meditate on having the strength to release this connection for this current lifetime, in order to find another soul mate connection for this experience! See this date as the date of closure in this manifestation, or lifetime, and see yourself moving forward without the pain. It’s not easy, yet to hold on when the relationship cannot happen is to lose out on all the joy and love that you could have with a soul mate that is available to you totally in this lifetime!
11 thoughts on “If We’re Soulmates, Why Aren’t We Together?”
hello, i have been friends with a guy since 10 months now and i think he’s my soulmate. we’ve been through the same struggles in life and spent deep connection with the same places but in a different time and individually. we met after a similar kind of suffering had ended. we’ve been in the same college for 3 years and never noticed each other and neither did we know anything about each other but one day during the last days of his suffering he saw my pictures of Italy trip on Instagram where he had also gone and he texted me in deep nostalgia of the place randomly. we’ve been friends since then and I’ve experienced this kind of connection for the first time but we still never met but we’ve had our friendship over text for 10 months and it has been intellectually and emotionally strong. But we’re just friends, though I have started feeling more than I should for him and I’m afraid he doesn’t feel the same but I get mixed signals from him. he might never accept as he doesn’t want to be with anyone anymore but I’m not sure if it’s just friendship or is there something more to it. we have decided to meet in the next 15 days that too after I insisted on meeting. I don’t want to conclude anything on the basis of our text friendship and yet wait to meet him but I think there is a deeper relationship and it’s beyond words. And the saddest part is that we don’t have a future.
why can’t you two be together?
Wow.. My story is pretty confusing and it’s so complicated… My soul mate is my ex boyfriends best friend. When he introduced us at once we connected.. I couldn’t resist my feelings towards him and he also couldn’t resist it.. I was only 18 years old back then ,,, We talked and sms everyday.. My SM was studying abroad and my bf didn’t have any idea wat was going on.. When he came back we couldn’t resist the passion between us and we made love.. It was his and my first time.. Then I decided to breakup with my bf.. Cos I couldn’t keep on lying to him.. But I never told him that i was in love with his best friend .. Nor did he tell my bf that.. But my BF went abroad to studies and he was staying with my SM.. And one day he came across our chat log and he found out everything.. We were so ashamed of ourselves.. We tried so hard to just end everything as it was hurting my bf so much .. My SM was living in the same room with him and he saw him crying.. It was the worst days of all of our lives.. I coudn’t stop myself from loving my bf’s bestfreind and he coudn’t stop loving me… But we both didn’t want to hurt him anymore… Then later on he moved out of my SM place.. But my SM and I couldn’t get over the guilt.. And as we have the same friends we didn’t know how to face them too.. His family was pressuring him and my family was pressuring me … So one day my SM just told me to not call him and not text him and that it is over but I am the love of his life and he will always love me.. He couldn’t handle the pressure.. He is a very shy person and a religious person .. he couldn’t get over the fact that we sinned and also we betrayed my bf.. It was the worst days of my life,. I called and cried and begged but he didn’t come… I was so frustrated at him.. Then at that time my best friend ( who is a boy) told took very great care of me.. Only because of him i had gotten through it all… And he started to fall for me.. He told me that he love me.. And i thought I won’t find anyone else who is as good as my SM but as he left me who better than my best friend to be with .. as I know that my Best friend will b the one person in the world who will never hurt me.. as we were best friends since childhood. So I accepted his love and I was also slowly having feelings for him.. But it was never like the passion and love I had for my SM.. Then out of no where my SM mailed me saying that the past couple of months have been the worst in his life.. He haven’t slept or eaten and he can’t stop thinking about me.. But I stopped thinking from heart and started thinking from my brain .. And i thought I can never hurt my best friend and I felt that my SM might again leave me.. And as i was angry he didn’t call me back for 5 months after all the times i begged him i just thought I won’t go back to him.. so I just told him that… And after a year or two from that also we skyped one night when I was abroad .. It hurt so much .. Because we couldn’t be together .. I can’t leave my best friend cos I can’t ever hurt him .. he is the one person who have been with me through thick or thin.. But my love for my SM is like nothing I have ever felt before.. now it’s been 06 years and I am now married to my best friend and my SM also got married through arranged marriage and he has a kid too…
But not a single day goes by without me thinking about him.. I will give the whole world also for just one hug from him.. And l thought as days go by it would be easier for me to deal with this.. but it never is.. My heart aches so much that it’s unbearable,,, Sometimes when I am doing something and I can feel that he is thinking about me right now.. I wish I hadn’t taken the decision to be with my best friend so quickly .. But wat to do now.. i want to move on but I can’t and I can’t stop thinking about him and it’s making me go crazy now… please help…
Omg, I feel so sorry for you. I would not wish what you are going through, on anyone. I feel like I have met my SM but my family is against our relationship. We have had a long distance relationship for 11 years now. Despite it being long distance, neither I nor him have had an eye for anyone else. But we both respect our parents. So we have decided to part ways and go for an arranged marriage. I don’t know what my future holds..all I know is I am scared to lose my SM and fear having to live in a loveless marriage till I die. Since you posted this in 2013 and its 2019 now, has anything changed for you? Or is it still the same?
ty for this article , Omg I got married to a girl but before we got married she conceived s child from me we had broke up right before I found out she was pregnant. When my son was born I got closer to her so we decided to get married years later like an agreement not a proposal and another daughter later we had broke up because she was not intemate with me. We broke up for 7 months but without divorce, a month after my break up I got with this amazing girl never felt this type of way before I felt true love like in the movies for 6 whole months we were inseperable, I know she is my soulmate but I was married and my wife and kids wanted me back so through gods eyes I was sinnin, I chose to go back. To give my wife a fair chance because in reality we never tried to work it out my wife changed for the better she tries so hard to appease and I am greatful that I see my kids everyday but I just cannot get over this soulmate of mine I find my self crying quietly at night because I miss her so much we haf so much in common and the love just came so natural with out even trying I am 28 she is 23 my wife 29 things are not so bad at home I cant complain but I just cant get over this girl and she is also in the same perdicament she is willing to be with me but I feel like I would be the bad guy if I leave plesase give me some insight my son is 7 daughter 2 yrs
Im in that situation every time I cleanse myself the vibe somehow comes up yeah it is painful that i have decided to do meditation and past life regression i have spoken to a hypnotherapy.
Hi leisha,
I am struggling to forget and move on from my soulmate.
I am also looking at therapies such as past life regression.
Did you do it? Did it help you and your heart? Could you share a little bit about if it was valuable to heal from soulmate (forbidden) love ?
Thanks so much
Hi Yemaya, yes sometimes the thought of someone can haunt you for years, but one tool that can be useful, is just putting them on the shelf, even for the time being, every-time they pop in your head, just tell your self, soon, or I will look at you later, this can be easier to mentally process than, no I’m done, or no we will never be together, just the idea that not right now, is sometimes easier than the idea of never.
Blessings and Big Hugs!
Jacqueline x9472
Thank you for this article. I can’t understand why my soulmate and I connected AFTER he was married. I would have been just fine never knowing that I had missed the One. Now I have all of these new feelings to contend with while he seems to have easily moved on. Loss, betrayal, longing, grief and feeling like I got tricked fill my days and I work hard to recover equilibrium. What is the point of making such an intensely powerful connection that cannot be? Or could be, but simply won’t?
Dear Yemaya:
Very well said. That powerful connection is something I run into frequently with clients and have experienced myself. It’s difficult, but if you can’t be together and you treasure the person, it is possible (and very fulfilling) to evolve the attachment into a very loving friendship and for both of you to live appropriately to the situation. Sometimes it takes years to accomplish, but achieving this kind of love for another is amazing, and what powerful friendships evolve!
Great article……
If you have tried and tried to let go and can’t…….don’t be afraid to seek professional counseling or therapy.
Life is way too short to stay stagnant or stuck on someone, or something, out of reach.
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500