Mental and Emotional Connections Matter
According to many popular magazines, sex is one of the best ways to intimately connect with your partner, however, you can have intimacy without sex. The reality is that there’s too much attention put on sex as a means of maintaining a relationship. But, couples need more than a connection between the sheets to maintain a strong bond through the hard times. They need to be able to work through commitment issues, sacrifices, and tons of misunderstandings, and it takes more than sex to do that. While there are many ways to connect with a partner in very meaningful and life-changing ways, I’m going to share with you four kinds of intimate connections that qualify as intimacy without sex.
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1. Touch
Hand-to-hand or hand-to-body contact seems to be a rarity in the 21st century. We are becoming a somewhat touch-phobic society, and that reaction can permeate into even the most intimate of our relationships. However, we need to remember that touch helps couples express themselves and be better understood, no matter how long they’ve been together. Touch makes couples feel connected, secure and can bring about a sense of team camaraderie.
What to Do
Touch your partner every chance you get. Touch them as a greeting, a farewell, when they’re happy, sad, fearful, celebrating or admitting defeat. Even a brief touch is a kind of intimacy without sex that gets your intention (desire, care, comfort, support, etc.) across without saying a word.
2. Reciprocal Touch
It’s one thing to initiate touch as a form of intimacy without sex. It’s another thing to reciprocate it. As I said before, touch is a conversation without words, and you need two people to have a conversation. So if your partner touches you, touch them back! Use this kind of intimacy to let them know you understand or that you feel the same way. Romantic relationships are all about reciprocity, after all.
What to Do
Touch is equally valuable, whether giving it or receiving it. It’s a powerful healer and touching your partner is an invitation for them to touch you back. You should initiate touch when you are offering your support or approval, but also when you are feeling vulnerable and unsure. And when your partner touches you, make sure they know that their touch is important and that you appreciate and encourage it. The more you do it, the more contagious it becomes.
3. Memory Displacement
You’ve seen it in movies a thousand times: A disconnected relationship is reconnected by the emotional tale of how the couple first met, fell in love, or helped each other through a tumultuous time. The fact is that we all respond to the romantic memories that make a relationship.
What to Do
Relationships are built on memories. But when too many of those memories become mundane or unpleasant, it’s easy to feel more disconnected than connected. If you and your partner are going through hard times, you can always supplement the current lack of happy memories with positive past memories.
4. Empathetic Rant Support
Couples lose their connection each time a partner sides with the enemy during an emotional outburst. And any time you challenge your partner’s emotional rant, you are basically siding with the bad guy/girl (whether you intend to or not). Resist the urge to do that!
What to Do
Partners rant, and say things you may disagree with, but remember, these words need to be said in order to help them get through the moment. As a sympathizing lover, you should respect that, and that respect is a form of intimacy without sex. These are the moments when a partner just needs to be heard and understood—nothing more. Resist the urge to “help,” correct their thinking or disagree in an attempt to help them learn from the experience because they will not learn. Instead, they will disconnect and think twice about sharing their feelings with you in the future.
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4 thoughts on “Intimacy Without Sex: 4 Other Ways to Connect”
Married 50 years and years ago I lost all interest in wife, we haven’t had sex in about 40 year’s and there is no love or intimacy at all. Now I personally like it this way, there’s no fighting arguing and no communication. Neither one of us is gay, I just enjoy being alone and by myself with no distractions. I don’t spend any time in our house that’s where my wife lives, I only go there to fix problems with the house. I have a small place i call home out back that houses my garage, wood work area and an apartment. It’s a good place back in the trees with nature. I really have no idea what wife has done all these year’s but I also don’t care.
My name is Michelle Gaut and I am concerned about love life what going for us. We break up seven years ago because he wants to get close to the Lord. So I let him then I start missing him looking for him on Facebook and find him. We started talking on Sweetest Day two years ago and. Now we at it again. What for us. Please tell me I want to know before New year comes in please.
I don’t know where to start but I know that touching each other and responding to the touch can say more than words could ever say. I have a friend who is committed to another woman but we have become very close to each other and he has my heart and love. He never said’s he Loves me though I tell him I know he feels my love and sees it in my eyes. I know he has strong feelings for me and loves me too by the way he touches and kisses me. Is there a future for us or am I fooling myself and should I let him go? Can you shed some light on this love I feel for this man – I would appreciate your input..
Thank you.
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