He’s Not a “Bad Boy,” He’s Just Bad
There are a variety of signs that can tell you if your partner is in the relationship with your or only acting the part. It’s takes a shift in your perspective to see when you’re in a bad relationship. In this case, your partner may not be stepping up or they are not acting like they are in a relationship with you. You’re doing everything to make it work and dedicating a lot of your energy to the relationship, but they just don’t seem to be taking it serious. Psychic Krishni ext. 5478 and I talked about this issue and she had some great advice and insights to share.
Is There a Problem?
1. If your partner is not showing interest in your day, your friends or other interests, there’s a problem.
2. If they only go out with you when there’s nothing else better (or nothing on TV).
3. If you’ve asked them to try to make it work, but they can’t, there’s a problem. As Krishni put it, “It’s like asking someone for a loan when they don’t have money in the bank.” If you’re asking them to commit or show more love, they might be emotionally unable to do it.
4. They are not treating you to the level you deserve that makes you feel good.
5. They are constantly unavailable.
6. You become an option, not a priority.
What Are You Avoiding?
Krishni has often found that when someone fills their entire life with the relationship, they are avoiding their own life. “What are you not making yourself available for in your own life?” Krishni asks her callers. She has found that people might be living in the past or living in the future by holding onto the vision of when she/he finally loves them. And since that person is emotionally unavailable, your life is passing you by.
End the Excuses
It’s often that Krishni has heard someone say they won’t leave the relationship because “they’re going through something.” It doesn’t matter if they were hurt in a past relationship, it’s the current one that’s the issue. You’re not responsible for how they will react. I love how Krishni put it, “You’re not doing anything against him. You’re doing something for yourself.”
If you want someone to treat you with love, then you need to start with treating yourself with love. If you continue to stay in a relationship that isn’t good, you’re telling the universe and everyone that this is all you deserve. “If you really want to attract and manifest and maintain a fantastic relationship, you really need to bring your best self,” Krishni reminds her callers.
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30 thoughts on “When a Good Love Goes Bad”
Thanks, but it is good to bear with your patner until he/she can change.
Your article is so true!
I was married to a “man” like that.
Everything and everyone was more important to him…even his tenant.
He would rather that I be upset and sad than to have his mother or his brother and his family be put out in any way. He is married to his money and his ‘mother/wife’ and would only part with money just to buy the love of ‘his family’. They only care about what he can do for them and what he can give them…and they rip him off every chance they get.
He told me I was nothing to him but his wife…not his family…and he could have as many wives as he wants.
I often asked why he married me and truly could not believe that I was living with his abuse(and his family’s) and hoping he would see the light one day and change.
He also was not interested in making love…and only got results by taking Viagara…which he got from his ‘friends’ ???
I am well rid of him now…after a long fight with lawyers and court…and all his demands for spousal support and getting part of my house. He ended up paying for the legal fees and divorce.
It makes me wonder now WHY I MARRIED HIM????
Thanks for the article…yes I am out…for good this time. Stayed in it for 2 years and kept putting up with the same shit…he would say he is coming to see me and either be 3 hours late or not turn up at all…he had a woman who was his BEST friend who he did more with her than me….didn’t she love that power…lied and lied about things…and its over…problem is now, be had become very violent..punched my glass door in…turns up in the middle of the night yelling and pissed…..He doesn’t want me…he just doesn’t want anyone else to have me…I will never let anyone treat me like that again….my fault but NEVER again…
Thanks for the article!! It made me open my eyes and re-think my current relationship:)
i left my husband for 5months for some one else i moved to a another state well we did”nt hit it off to good i moved out in a m onth he moved his old sweet heart back in knowing that i still careabout him a diamond suppose to get marry and they never got alone at all she took money from him this wasn”t the first time he took her back he very selfish he can be a good guy but he want old friend in bed with him he a sex crazy person he been married four time
Thank you for the article!! I quit (left) a relationship two months ago from symptoms you described.
1. He was ok without calling me so I didn’t see his interst even he repeated he loved me.
3. He excused he needed take care of his mom who was cancer and flew every weekend to FL and tied with a lot of issues with his business partners.
4. He repeated I deserve more but he cannot treat me well under the difficult circumstance with his mom and challenging partners and business. finally I felt that’ just excuse.
5. He became constantly unavailable
6. I was option, if he could keep since if we should stop this relationship then he tried to say he would make time but it didn’t happen.
So I believe I made a right decision for me to love and take care of myself. I pray the universe to lead me to the man who can grow together. I only wish longer GOOD relationship for the rest of my life!!
Karmen, if I were U I would RUN..not walk away from this so called “man”.
He obviously has issues within himself. He could be narcasistic, thinking only
of himself. Maybe U just chose to stay with him longer than his ex’s did.
They know him just like u do. He has taken enough of your life, energy,
and love. Don’t let him do it again. He seems to be a really good manipulator.
It’s been 7 weeks since I dropped him after audio recording him cheating on me in “MY” house! I really needed this confirmation! Thank you for writing this…..
I’M SO DONE WITH HIM, but angry for allowing myself to go back & forth with him for 4 1/2 yrs over & over & wasting my time loving someone who wasn’t deservant of me at all! U described him to a “T”!
He’s Such A “PC OF SHIT”!
L.M.
BINGO!
I was with this guy for almost 13 years, and since i new him he said he was always buzy and he did not have time. He was never interested in what i wanted or how i felt. I always had the hope that the day of tommorrow he would realize that my love was real and he would change and be different, but that never happened. I just finally realized that and took the step that i had should have taken many years ago, leave him and move on. It was not easy and its hard as my days go by but im better off alone and at peace than being with someone with pain and hurt day after day. Thank you for this great article it hit my situation perfectly. God Bless.
Thank you for sharing it with us. I was struggling in my 21 years marriage and now i find out that i was avoiding my own life. so what will be done next? As kids will hurt and even we are not secure financially.
Thank you sooo much.. for you article. I just ended a relationship and i think about him daily. But the article discribed him to a T.. I owe myself alot more also the Universe knows that I’m a nice and gentle Woman…
I like the bit where you stated the love bank can be empty, I was in that situation and could not give anymore IN LOVE love as I felt exhausted with it. I have learnt that sometimes you have to step back and preserve self. Good article.
Wow I really needed to read this. I was having second thoughts about leaving a relationship but on sentence did it for me. – ” If you continue to stay in a relationship that isn’t good, you’re telling the universe and everyone that this is all you deserve”. I will ask the universe to send me someone who is right for me. Thank you so much!!!! What an eye opener!
Great advice, thank you! Unfortunatly my self-deception and denial about my now ex fiancee has put me in a financial war now…I regret every meeting her!
I use to put up with a guy like that. Im so glad its no longer an issue anymore.
Dear Irene,
IF counseling and sex therapy too… is not an option ( on HIS end )…..get out.
You need to ask yourself : Do you merely want to ” survive ” a relationship ???…. Or do you want to be happy in a relationship ????
He started pushing you away not long after he married you….is what you said. He has issues he needs to work on…..you cannot ” fix ” him without utilizing professional help…..if he won’t go to counseling and go thru a bit of sex therapy…..you need to leave.
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500
Dear Karmen,
He doesn’t know who he is or what he wants AND keeps on repeating the same old pattern of behavior.
And from a psychic perspective…my Guides do NOT see him changing either.
…..do yourself a favor and , for the sake of your sanity, close that door and move on to find a real man who will appreciate you and knows who HE is and WHAT he wants.
Blessed Be )O(
Gina Rose ext.9500
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great direction!
Thank u for this it was what i needed to hear right at this moment. Especially the part about not doing anything against them and doing something for myself….thank u thank u.
I am an emotional wreck! Have been married 3 years. My husband made love to me the day after we got married. Then proceeded to literally push me away. He had prostate surgery 7 years ago, used Viagra, and we still enjoyed sex a couple times a year, he was still loving and affectionate. Then BAM! Nothing! He started belittling me in front of other people, correcting everything I said, justified his actions by comparing them to his daughter disabling her 5 year old. He makes or breaks plans according to his wants. And the list goes on. I have lost all interest in most of my hobbies and find myself sitting in front of the TV with him. We walk or ride bike and go jeeping in the mountains. He is married to his money, that is his love. Do I have a chance of surviving this relationship, or do I get out while I still have some sanity left?
Boy, you said it.
Very good advice, Krishni !!!!!
For 5 years, my best friend and I shared a relationship that people dream of. We loved being together, enjoyed each others personalities, challenged each other to be the best we could be, and even especially, enjoyed each others bodies. Everything was perfect. However, I was his 6th relationship, 4 marriages and two engagements ours lasting the longest. He seems to be always searching for the perfect person and after five years together, he went away for the weekend only to come home to say he met the “love of his life” and he needed to persue this love. Without a thought he was gone. I have missed the relationship and him terribly. Things have not gone as he planned and he calls on occassion to say he misses me or to flirt, but that he needs to make this new relationship work as now… there is a baby. What kind of person do you think this is?
Thank you for this! I just walked away from someone who showed all these signs. It was an extremely difficult thing to do, and I keep asking myself every day if I did the right thing. Reading this helped – a lot!
This was such a truly helpful article…I cannot even tell you in words…SO HELPFUL and insightful. I am a Leo. You described me…you described the guy. Fortunately I have already begun my process of transofrmation so at least I have made huge changes and soon will be out on my own. Thank you so much.
All of this is so very true. You determine how you are treated in a relationship. If someone isn’t treating you like you know you deserve, leave. If they really want to be in your life they’ll be back with better behavior. But even then, some people just are not at the stage of growth that you are and simply need more time anyway from you to develop into the person that you need for them to be.
krishmi its very correct 🙂
thank you I can’t help it, why I want so much good for her