Often times, porn provides a substitute to sexual gratification which a man lacks from his partner. Either he suffers from medical problems, addiction, his own insecurities or shame about sex — or he has certain fantasies he’s too afraid toexpress to his partner.
Instead of communicating these desires, he chooses to act them out in the form of porn and fantasy. In these cases, porn can actually widen the bridge between a couple who is already in trouble.
Pornography does not mean that a man has lost interest, is cheating — or is a pervert in need of therapy. When men fantasize about other women, it’s not an emotional attachment, but rather an image to help him “get off.” Some men share this part of their lives with their partner in the form of playful videos, Web images, or racy love quotes. Others become closet admirers, fearing their partner’s reaction to these urges. It’s these hidden desires that can be themost dangerous for a relationship.
If you do not think that your partner is not part of these statistics, and you have never discussed it, perhaps it’s time you bring up the topic. This is something an intimate couple should know about eachother, and here’s why.
If You Can’t Beat It, Join In
Porn can be both a healthy, shared portion of the “I love you” relationship — or a crutch for deep, underlying problems. While there is certainly a huge share of demeaning hardcore pornography, there’s also a portion of soft porn, which both sexes can appreciate.
Many couples can find a porn compromise by opening each other up to discussion, and creating ground rules for sharing in these types of fantasies.
In this scenario, porn is no longer a dirty secret for a man, but a way for him to communicate intimacy with his partner.
Does your guy sound healthy or not? Is his porn habit out of control? Please share!
