Picky in Love
Have you ever considered that the reason you haven’t found Mr. or Ms. Right might be because you are way too picky when it comes to finding that special someone? Quite a few people are picky when it comes to finding a long-term partner. This can be more troublesome than you think. It could actually leave you feeling alone as you grow older and may even cause some other problems within your life.
Everyone wants to be loved, whether we admit it or not. As babies, we crave love more than anything else in the world, and we continue to crave it as we grow older. It is just that some of us are better at hiding our needs than others. The problem that occurs when your expectations are way too high and unreasonable is that of isolation and loneliness. These are both damaging factors in the long run.
Who are destined to fall in love with? Find out with a love reading from Psychic Miriam ext. 9230.
Here are a few ways you can tell if you are too picky when it comes to relationships.
You Ask For The Impossible
If you have a list a mile-long stating what you want in another individual including physical traits such as 6’1 tall, blue eyes and dimples, you may be waiting to meet your special someone for an extremely long time.
Have you told your friends that you will only date someone if they are a doctor, independently wealthy or if they own their own home? If you have a list of expectations that are impossible to meet, you’ll be one lonely individual and yes, you are too picky.
See who’s waiting to win your heart with a psychic reading from Psychic Reed ext. 5105.
You Keep To Your Own Circle
If you expect to find your special someone in your own circle of friends and through the help of family members, you are closing yourself off to a world of opportunities. You are being too picky if you demand and expect that this is the way you will meet the love of your life.
Finding someone to love is about opening yourself up to love and the more you keep to your own circle, the less chance you have of finding it. If you are only open to meeting someone through your own personal connections and friends, you are limiting yourself, trying to control how love will happen for you and being too picky overall.
You Cut People Off Within Seconds
You are definitely too picky if after a first date you find 20 things wrong with someone. If you immediately close the door and cut that individual out of your life without question, you are going to be the one who loses out in the end. Sadly, many people have this bad habit of finding flaws in people only to push people away and keep them at a distance. There might be some work that you have to do on yourself if you are like this. Picking out flaws in another individual usually portrays low confidence and a fear of intimacy within the self. If you tend to do this on a first date and have already decided that the person is not for you within minutes, you are being too picky. You need to practice giving another individual a chance to get to know you and a chance to let you know them before cutting them out of your life.
“Listen to your heart instead of your fearful mind.” – Psychic Phillip ext. 9485
31 thoughts on “Are You Too Picky?”
Though i have gone through all the comments and felt each one genuine,but being a man I can say you that the experience here in my life is almost similar…I have always tried to be compassionate and cool headed human being who loves all and like to be treated as a human…but met the ladies who at thetime of their hard days with broken hearts needed some shoulder to bank on,needed someone to pay your hospital bills after denied by father and ex-husband and after few weeks suddenly stated politely that she has found someone of a prince charming.Even it happened that again the same old good freind of mine has called back(sometimes) and in other cases i came to know that again they have got cheated/beaten by someone drunken with whom she was obssessed with.Now how many am i supposed to be optiistic and polite and human and sincere to keep myself spotless and grow older andlonely.I feel there is no standard theory but yes you have to be faithfull on good human being in this morally economic world.
So I found a man who was everything I wanted, and after 4 months of a very loving relationship he finished it because he couldn’t be what I wanted him to be or give me what I deserve. In my eyes he was everything! Where does that leave me know???
After leaving my partner of 30+ years once I found out he was cheating I feel totally unsure of what life can be. I have seen and heard so much from gals my age about loser after loser. I has such zing for my partner of 30+ years and where did it get me? Cheated on. As I move forward I realize more and more that I don`t know what I don`t know. It is a strange world. I think there is so much access to ways to cheat on your partner….is so easy and if you are not committed to faithfulness it is bound to happen.
I see man and woman relationships as a starting base for figuring out how we deal with life and figure out an solution that works for both…and this is what communities/states/countries/nations need to do. Figure out how we work together to make life better for both of us…and pass this on to our children. Take a good look around us..we are not doing a good job of this at all. If we can`t figure how to make it work as a couple, how can we figure it out as a world? Pretty scary – almost hopeless from what I see and hear everyday. I have hope…but morality plays a big piece in all of this. And morality is really what comes into play when no one else is watching…and you can get away without being caught doing something bad. Good luck world…love and faithfulness is a good starting point. Where do we all fit ..it is up to each of us.
So question… What happens when you have too many options, I’m not opposed to finding love, but I want to feel it from the start… The “sparks” …not tooting my own horn at all! But everyone I meet falls in love with me treat me like a queen and would give me all the things I want in life but I never “feel it” …. Am I being to picky also? And if so how do I change this so I don’t keep breaking people’s hearts? I’m all about giving people chances but hey when you know … You know
I understand the concept of getting older. My expectations of finding the right one have always been to high. But then I think about past relationships and what I’ve had and its hard because I seem to weed out the ones that resemble the past. As in, who ever I meet and don’t have the same qualities as they did in the past aren’t going to satisfy me. As I get older I grow worrying if ill ever find the right one. I have a huge heart and guess I just need to let people in.
I don’t think picky is the correct word! I am a lovely person inside and out, and because of that I seem to attract men who wants to be loved but is unable to return that love because they are already attached to someone or married. These men are only after one or two things: sex or what you can give them. I try to open myself to love and always get disappointed in the long run, and because of that I’d rather to choose wisely but for the time being if I’m to be alone them so be it.. I could say that I hate men because I’ve dated the cheaters, woman beater, user, charmers, the unappreciated, but that only led me to close myself off or I could say putting myself out there. The moral of the story is I have a lot of love to give but it’s worth giving to someone who is worthy and appreciative of it..
let me tell you article could be way out there pass the line to people who has gave and gave never asking anything in return, never held a friend or either wife to any standards but was left broken hearted and all to pieces. My assets now or completely depleted and to top it off after having everything paid off it is gone and guess who is left for their family to help and I really mean help. I loved working and man did I have a great career and gave jewelry, gems, and most anything all I asked for was money for tank to get me to work and come home to stuff we never even used. Now I was diagnoised with mitral valve prolapse at 32 that required meds. These meds now have left me with early onset dementia and there is no hope for SSI benefits and have lo0st half my pension and you think I need to lower my expectations like I was dependent on them. Come on when the doctors said I could no longer work and was a liability on the job my marriage didn’t last a year. Next time keep your romance thoughts to yourself if you have not had enough punishment go out tomorrow get married and give to them with nothing left after 15 years.Plus most women think men just crave phoney make up and costume jewelry, wrong with their attitude.
I believe you,but a lot of men’s there are not honest and i don even believe is good men on the planet and is too hard to fall in love with someone who does care for you but I’m sure one day the good one will come i hope so,i truly believe your word but men are disappointed but I believe my faith,men should understand that is only two things God created in this planet is men and women so what can we be nice to each other,
I am not sure what my problem is/was. Probably the standard issue, fear of intimacy.
so I dated a lot in between marriages 19 years apart, and now 19 years on my own again.
Dated here and there but now there has been one person briefly in 8 years. I don’t think I am picky, well maybe a little. I think the bottom line for me is I don’t want to wade through 100 frogs. However, I believe life could be so enriched with a special someone. I am in the later stages of my life, should I accept that I am happen with all the other riches in my life. Or ask for more?
Ive been in a relationship where the guy breaks up with me repeatedly because he’s just not ready and feels he can’t be faithful. He ends up saying just give him time. Should I wait for this guy since I’m in love with him?
This ones for Virgo 2757,
Being a perfectionist is very hard work and by having far too much in common well as it just goes to show you that there was no room for expansion and I gather that you was in one of those just money and lust relationships upon where your love life just fell apart at the end of the day, yes and it is pretty sad just tolerating someone, as I feel sorry for you as you had this bad experience of which that you had the person of your dreams and being picky, yes you can be as this is part of your perfectionism way just like myself, but just be picky in personality traits as not for what that other person does or what that they do with there lives as life I far too short to be able to go out and to get that Mr right or Mrs right, as you must learn to except for what that they are doing in there life and just be happy with that, as you should either meet up with a Capricorn or even a Taurean or another Virgo like yourself for far better compatibility or even go out with a water sign personality trait and that would be either a Cancer or Cancerian or even a Scorpio or a Scorpion as these would give you a bit of a spark within your life also, as I have been happily married to a Capricorn for 19 long years now and I could never be much happier and I have two wonderful Taurean children of whom I adore very much and my immediate family is very extremely close, as I wish you well in your search and may god bless you for the near distant future as I am happy for what I have got and so will you if you just give things a bit of a go, bye for now and the best of British and god bless.
I think this is funny, I have tried to be all of the above and then some, but when you have a guy pick you up in an old van with all kinds of junk in it, then you remember all those crime stories, that is not good, at the end of the date, the police stops the old van, looks at his license and tags and they are from different states its like, I won’t do this again. Or you meet your date and he picks you up in a beat up car you think I hope nothing comes apart when he is driving, get to the restaurant and you feel like Austin Powell because he has one blue eye and one hazel, and you want to say MOLE! You should really tell people I have a special feature like forest I have gifted eyes so your date has an idea. Men with money they want to tell you every asset they own and then ask if you would think of marrying again on the first date NOT. Oh and then there are the older men that had children late, they want you to love the kids, so they can sit on your couch and you can cook, clean and they can play with the kids. What can I say it just is trial and error, keep on kissing frogs one of them will be the Prince your waiting for….lol
Terri,
I understand your upset. If I were in you shoes I am sure I would feel the same way. I know you probably won’t believe me even if say it, but there are plenty of good men out there. I know because I am in contact with them all the time. I even think of myself as being a good man.
You ask why do you keep pulling in losers and the what not into your life. I wish I could give you a definite answer, because I can tell you desperately would like to know why. so even though I can’t help you with this…..I want you to know I heard you and understand.
I’m sealed off a lot, maybe that’s why I’m single. I’m also a little hostile, aka, i am REALLY hostile. I have my reasons. I’m not picky, I just have worked so hard to put up a wall between me and the world, I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to let it down.
So I don’t think this article is about lowering your standards it’s about being open to love. Sometimes when we don’t love ourselves enough we sabotage opportunities for love because we are afraid we are not good enough to be loved. We push away the people who can love us and attract the people who don’t connect with us or love us. When you love yourself you are open to loving others and you attract love to you. The self doubts we have about ourselves creates that wall from finding love. It’s about confidence and knowing who you are.
Picky? Always thought I was , I kept ending up with the same thing, no matter what I did. Now I am older… much older and alone. Drunks, drug users, con artist, users that needed a roof, thieves …All I ever wanted was to be loved, yes… maybe adored a little. I was never the pretty one, the first choice or even worth being good to. It now has made me hard and angry! I don’t trust a man to care for or about me. I am sick of being alone and sometimes settled just for a warm body to talk to. I don’t think I have been intimate in nearly 10 years and it makes me so sad to know my life is almost to an end and never once have I been loved! I don’t have money and I don’t think this can help, I just needed to say it.
Miriam – I see what you are saying. Not all of it is wrong or right. However, I am with all the other readers (Male & Female) that you must be wise – wise is a better word then picky. Wise to choose correctly not because we are older, etc. Wise to not just go with a person because they look good but also not go with a person who has a good heart but has no income, not great at communicating, may not be clean, etc. I married too young and chose ok but in the long run I should have waited to chose better. We are now wiser as all these readers are telling you we are. We are wiser to chose the right person because we deserve someone better!!!
Thanks!
Hi there, when we are so picky, and I am, we just miss the opportunity to know someone that could be the right one,!!
When I met my boyfriend on our first date he told me he was a smoker, a big deal breaker for me and I decided im not seen him again, but he called me next day, he was so charming that I decided give him a chance!! We are together for almost 2 years, and I love him so, think twice,before you say no at the first date or sight!!!
Good luck to everyone!! 🙂
I met a man at bingo-and when I shook his hand there was sparks and I knew this
was a nice guy-we are still friends-my husband died and my cousin said -find a friend
to get over grief-and it was good advice.
For me if it does nt feel right then its not going to happen. How often have we been with someone who fit the bill? Right not too iften and divorce has followed suite.
But he doesnt have to be pergect, not even great looking just has to provide the commonality and chemistry I need.
I trust my gut feelings. I know myself well enough and it only takes one date..If the relationship just doesn’t “feel” right it’s over…we are given instincts for a reason..too often, to our detriment, we don’t listen to that little voice that says run…
Me just want to meet someone normal ,i seem to always run into guys that are bums,lossers with no future or no job is a drunk or beaters and cheaters etc. And i dont go to them they come to me ,i dont even have to try they just come to me .Why is it that i atract these type ,is it that cause of the way i feel about me ?? Please is there even anyone left out there for me and am getting to old for the bar seen and sick of it cause i worked there all my adult life ,then tried commuter dateing all i met were the same type is that all there is anymore ,i wish i could talk to a psychic but cant afford it .Please does anyone have a answer for me out there am so lonely.
Why do you always assume that your readers are Female.There are a lot of MALES that read this also.
i donot know why iam picky in love when it comes chosing my life partner
Interesting viewpoint, but now let me tell you how it is from the other side. If anything, I wasn’t picky enough…I was so desperate to be loved and afraid of being alone that I settled too easily, allowing people to take advantage of me, thinking that maybe I wasn’t good enough to have the kind of love I wanted, and ultimately marrying a guy that was vanilla: he was decent (translation: he wasn’t doing drugs, beating me or stealing my stuff), he had a pretty good income…for that time, but which has not withstood the costs of inflation over the years or supplied very well for unexpected medical bills…and we had just enough in common at that time to have some interesting conversations, although we’ve grown so far apart over the years that we barely talk anymore unless it’s necessary. I’m never more alone than when I’m in a room with him. Yeah, I WISH I’d been LOTS more picky.
i donot know why picky when it comes to chose my life partner i need your help
i donot why iam picky when it comes to chose my life partner,ithink i need your help.
This was not for me because I’m just weighing my option right now seen how it fills to be treated a little more appreciate.But yes I would say I want to chose a little more carefully because the fact that I have kids.
I think its good to stick to having high expectations!! I feel the reason there are so many divorces and such, is people start listening to, your: getting old, biological clock, too picky, etc,etc. and end up SETTLING because of peer pressure! Sometime, I hear, boy you have high expectations?, and I say, damn right I do, why shouldn’t I????? Instead of lowering them, I know, i will know, when the magic happens, and she might be nothing like my expectations, but everything like my hearts desire! your friend, Ronnie
this is true about my love lif . than u for get’n me to see ts sid of me
what if you don’t see wrong in the person you love and he maybe you soul mate. and yet there’s a communication gap.