Understanding Where You’ve Been and Where You’re Going
OK… you’ve done your homework. You’ve read the self-help books. You’ve driven your dear friends half mad rehashing the stories of times gone by. You’ve stopped stalking through Facebook. You’ve even met someone wonderful (and cute and sexy, etc.) who thinks you are the greatest thing since bread and butter pickles. And then you see the ex in person… after all this time!
Depending on the amount of time that has passed and depending on the last words exchanged between you two, the encounter can be bittersweet or genuinely disturbing. Either way, you have to find a way to file it under “weird stuff” and be able to move on so it does not affect your new relationship or any other part of your life.
When this moment happens, direct your energy in a mature and genuinely caring manner. After all, at one time, you really loved this person. Let that be the fall back position. If the former object of your affection comes from their fall back position of immaturity and temper tantrums, you can rest assured that they have yet to fully release the love they had for you. There is a certain comfort in knowing that all by itself! Know that all the love, work and sacrifice you made while you were with your (now) ex has haunted them and, frankly, no amount of “spin” can change the reality of your past together. In other words: neither of you were all bad!
There are many exes who have been able to be cautious friends, but there are far more who are last seen going over the horizon screaming obscenities. In a perfect world, love would triumph. In a perfect world, even when the circumstances had changed to such a point that lovers were lost along the way and now their time together was through, they would still focus on the love and wish one another the very best in the future. As you know, this world is far from perfect! What happens if you see your ex with the new lover… especially when you have yet to make such a connection? You take a deep breath and smile. Introduce yourself if you are feeling particularly strong. Remember: There was a time when YOU were the apple of your ex’s eye and almost everything comes to an end sooner or later. You might very well be looking into the eyes of the “future ex-girl/boyfriend”!
Consider this, gentle reader: Your relationship did not fail. It had an expiration date. When the goal was achieved (as it had been decided between you two from even before your birth), it was time to move on. When asked, the great anthropologist Margaret Mead had this to say to the reporter who asked how she felt about her two “failed” marriages: “My marriages did not fail. They did exactly what they needed to do for the time in which they were needed. They were quite successful at that!” Wise words, to be sure.
As time goes on, exes fade away. The memories connected to them can either be a source of delight or a source of sorrow. The choice is yours. However, if you come from a place of compassion and maturity (no matter how difficult that may be!) you will walk away from the encounter with more closure and more satisfaction than you could ever imagine.
Call your trusted psychic and see for yourself the impact such a stand can make. You can look directly into the heart of the matter and see that love is the one thing strong enough to never completely die. It, like energy, cannot be destroyed… it can only change forms. If you have not already met your new love, find out when to anticipate their arrival and let all your wonderful qualities (that made your ex fall in love with you in the first place) rise to greet the new day. You are truly loved!
8 thoughts on “Dealing With Your Past… Face to Face!”
Hello Jesse, What a great article! Your advice that you sometimes have find a way to file it under “weird stuff” and move on is very wise indeed!
Jess, my dear friend, that was an AWESOME blog!!! It’s such a weird feeling seeing that “ex” in the A&P (that’s where I saw mine lol), restaurant, or wherever – and sometimes feeling that feeling not of “I wish we were back together!”, but of “getting ill” lol! But whatever it’s meant to be, to see for the last time you did the right thing and moved on. Brand new start lies ahead! Makes you stronger 😉 Anyway, great writing and keep it coming!!!!! Truly some great advice from a truly gifted lady!
Love and Hugs!!
M
Thank you for the very informative article!
I was in a 2-yr relationship that progressed into what I thought was a bliss-full marriage of 6 weeks under the same roof. My elderly Mother needed me to attend to her so my “husband” took that as the opportunity to get involved with someone else. Needless to say, a little over 6 months later “it” was over (for him)!
It took me 5 years and a rekindled addiction to stop crying. Finally got “delivered’ from the addiction; but, not the anger! Finally, got the anger subsided and the date of what would have been our 15th anniversary came and went and I didn’t even remember until a month later!
One thing I have come to realize is that people come into our lives and sometimes travel the same road “we’re” on for a while until their journey takes them on another path.
Life, love and lessons happen! But when I finally realized that some of these lessons and the people that bring them are not personal or necessarily meant for me, I now enjoy my life and all that it brings, because I know there is a lesson to be learned from it and “this too shall pass”!
Thank you Psychic Jessie, Great article. I have had a brief relationship with a female recently and bumped in to her recently at a friends party, I ignored her politely but she flaunted her NEW boyfriend, and was passive aggresive towards me, of course I still had feelings for her, and will do for a while, however what I found comforting was the bit you wrote that maybe we had agreed that we were only going to be a brief relationship and to understand this! I agree it has been difficult but I have learned through Psychic Rose that life is a spiritual journy, this alone has changed my perception of people and life.
Great comforting article.
Dear Jesse
that was an interesting and insightful article I have been lucky with nearly all of my past relationships, remaining friends with all of the guys I’ve had relationships with including my first husband whose family I remained friends with also until we lost contact after his mother passed on, the only ever relationship to date which to me ended badly was when his family forced him into an arranged marriage and we had to split and since then he has died- although I also had married when I found out it was as if someone had torn out my heart- especially as I learned he’d never stopped loving me either
Hi Jess,
This was very good article. I think being mature and etting go, and remembering the times when love was shared, is important I don’t think love ever ends, it just changes form.
I am not sure the memory of the “ex” ever goes away, it just becomes more faded. . . at least that is my experience.
I would like to talk with you about my relationship possibilities in the near future. When
is the best time to call for you?
Hi, Monique! I don’t think I have ever had the pleasure of reading for you, but I would love to have the chance! As for the rates for a reading, they are consistent with my tier here at California Psychics and it would depend on how long we had for the reading. However, just from what I am feeling from you right now, I would say there is a strong chance you are going to meet someone in late January.
Make an appt. or hop in my outdial queue and we will clarify your romantic future!
Have a wonderful weekend and keep your eyes and ears open…romance can come from all kinds of places!
Hello Jesse, how are you? Just wondering how much would it cost for me to talk to you. I just need to ask a couple of questions that’s all! I just want to know if I will feel happy again soon? and whether it will be on my own or with a partner?
Thanks,
monique : )