Are they lying to you? You might be able to figure that out from some very basic body language cues and verbal patterns.
Can You Really Tell if Somebody is Lying By Observing Them?
With the study of body language, it’s important that you must study the “whole package” of an event or situation. To pick out one or two gestures and be convinced that the person is lying based on those is irresponsible. It takes a knowledge of that person, and their personal habits, expressions, and a history of interaction with them to be able to clearly point out what behaviors are odd and out of place, and which are normal for them.
With that in mind here are a number of “tells” that some people display when lying:
1. If you’re talking to someone about commitment, and they’re not interested in taking the relationship to the “next level,” but don’t want to tell you, or are lying to you, their eyes may dart around the room, mentally seeking escape!
2. If they’re usually not “touchy feely” and they keep touching your forearms while trying to convince you of something, it could be a lie.
3. Some folks may avoid direct eye contact, yet this is something that some people do normally, as it’s uncomfortable for them.
4. Their hands may go to behind their ears, or scratch around their necks. Sometimes they will touch their face repeatedly. Get more personalized advice, contact a psychic today!
5. Facial expressions may not match words, or the timing is off. As if they have to think for a split second what emotion they should display.
6. Their expressions may be limited to around the mouth, instead of involving the eyes, eyebrows, and forehead.
7. They may be uncomfortable speaking facing front to front, and turn off at an angle.
8. If they’re usually not as chatty, and fill the silences with chatter, or give an abundance of facts and details in an unusual manner.
9. Sometimes you’ll find them shifting topics quickly, trying to distract you. A test you can sometimes use is to watch their body language—if you suddenly drop that line of conversation and move to another topic, are they physically relieved? Relaxed now?
10. Where they stand can tell you how comfortable they are with the topic.
11. They can use humor or sarcasm to deflect you.
12. Many of you have heard that “the eyes shifting to the left show a liar,” but according to Richard Bandler and John Grinder in the book Frogs Into Princes, it depends on many things, including if they’re right or left handed, so be careful. These are what they use as “general” guidelines. Looking up to the left, for most right-handed people, means that they are “visually constructing” the scene (making it up). And for that same person, eyes directly to the right would suggest “visually remembering images”!
So if you have your doubts, maybe this will help you to sort it out for yourself; however, there are no ways to prove a lie like on TV and the movies except (to some degree) the lie detector, and even that can be fooled sometimes!
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11 thoughts on “Learn the Body Language of Liars”
Its really a shame we have to “observe body language” just to see if or when someone is lying. Its one thing to lie to make someone FEEL better about themselves, its completely ANOTHER thing when people lie to cover up mucking someone over! I’m 42 years old, and to this day, I will take a tongue lashing AND LECTURE or worse, OVER telling a lie. Its no wonder cops believe NO ONE, cause EVERYBODY THEY come in contact with, are usually lying, when if they just told the truth, they’d go on and get the consequences/punishment OVER WITH, instead of dragging it out. It kills me because I feel like I take beatings over being honest, yet the chickens out there just want to keep on lying.
I also find that people who raise their voices when confronted are usually lying or trying to deceive you. I have come across very few who can take on a controlled tone even when they are lying but the other body language gives them away.
The reality is we have all needed to lie at some point, but of course for the good, it does not make us bad people, lies is like drinking alchohol, in moderation maybe but not all the time, if we are all really truthful and honest with ourselve’s i’m sure we could all agree we have told a lie recently, like hey honey of course you look amazing tonight!
I was married to an FBI agent for 32 years…..they also teach these methods to law enforcement for interrogation purposes.
Psychiatrists MD’s learn these methods in school as well.
Great post, thank you for this post. This will help those people who want to go for the date. Because if you will not take this seriously then it will hurt you after you lost yourself. Mainly girls commit this type of understand they understand that the person is not right for her but then also they are not ready to accept it they start ignoring it and cries after times goes out. It has been truly said that the when time goes out you are helpless you can’t do anything instead of crying and blaming yourself and living your life in lots of pain.
Thanks guy four wonderful advises but could someone help me to pay my school fees for my University Study please
No need of proving if somebody is lying! No need of knowing neither detecting! Because the truth, it is not me or whoever they are talking with they are lying/fooling around but it is there self. And no matter how convincing they may appear but in the end they will always be at the losing end! So just be true to yourself!
Thank you for pointing out at the start that leaping to a judgment on a single observation is irresponsible. I have heard the looking left or right technique given a variety of rationales, some of which reverse the significanse of the direction. I was quite surprised the first time I heard someone equate looking up and to the left with lying, because, spending so much time reading, I naturally look to the top left whenever I am expected to supply some data — simply because that’s where English writing starts, top left of the visual field defined by a page. Then, too, the conclusion that if someone is visualizing something they must be making it up is faulty. Many of us memorize most effectively via visual image. A variation on this rationale for the right/left bias was used on the TV show “The Mentalist,” in which Patrick Jane decides someone is lying because the direction their eyes looked before answering indicated that the subject was activating the cerebelum devoted to creative thinking. This presupposes that the only possible manifestation of creativity when answering a question is to lie. Some people (including the character of Patrick Jane) find original and creative ways to express themselves while telling the truth. Of course Jane doesn’t necessarily tell the truth when he explains his methods…
There’s only one way to not get caught, just be straight and honest, cuts all the nonsense out!
Great article, Yemaya! These are great tips to use in conjunction with the inner guide/lie detector we all have. At times, we might jump to conclusions based on a feeling (or sometimes a paranoia or projection) we may have, though the points you share here provide helpful and objective things to take note of that we can, and should consider along with what we sense so that we can avoid jumping to conclusions and causing ourselves, and the other person some unwarranted upset. =)
The Psychiatrists I read for study their patients in such a manner as well…..Psychiatrists are trained to watch body language, including facial movements, the way a person strings their sentences together, the words they choose in those sentences, the tone of the message in the sentences…etc etc…
very informative article, Yemaya.