Anthony in Manassas writes:
I am a gay person who is still in love with my former partner. Originally from Long Island, I moved to Virginia in July of 2005 for an employment opportunity. We have had a stormy relationship at times, but I feel that this person is my soulmate. He hasn’t responded to my emails. I haven’t communicated with him for quite sometime because I feel that he doesn’t want to reconnect. I wonder if we ever will? I can’t seem to get over him, even though I have been dating another person.
Dear Anthony,
While I do think you will hear from your former partner, I really don’t want to get your hopes up relative to this relationship.
It appears that you two will share a conversation, following written communication. It looks more like snail-mail than email for the initial contact. The conversation will be fairly light, almost like a courtesy call. It will be relatively brief.
It seems as though your old flame has determined to move on with his life. A slightly guarded and uncomfortable ‘keeping in touch’ relationship is possible, but I don’t see the two of you coming back together or connecting on any real level. And with as much love as you still have for this man, I really want you to prepare for this and be careful.
I honestly don’t know that you will ever “get over” him completely. That’s the down side of truly loving someone. Hope does keep love alive — it gives it power. You are still holding on to hope, even though your logical mind tells you it’s not practical. I could give you a list of reasons why you should let go of your hope and move on, but it’s up to you to decide to actually do it.
As for your soulmate — well, let me just say I don’t think you’ve met him yet. He is out there, and he will find his way to you when the time is right.
Gay or straight — love is love. It brings with it the ultimate joys and highs of life, and leaves an aftermath of pain when it departs.
Brightest Blessings,
Red
