Red Responds: Falling in Love With Her Neighbor, the EMT

Dear Red,

I moved to this area in June and toward the end of that month, I had a nose
bleed that was so severe that I had to call 911. My neighbor, whom I
did not know, is the town’s EMT and he came over to help. He kept
coming to visit me after that to make sure that I was OK. It wasn’t
long before we started a much closer relationship than friends.

Because of bad past relationships, he said he wasn’t able to give me
what I wanted, but we continued to see each other. In the meantime, I’m
falling in love with this man. He seemed to be perfect in every way,
honest, caring, etc. I really thought, given time, that this could turn
in to something more permanent. The other day he came to me to let me know
that there is someone who he has been interested in for a long time, who was not available but she is now and he wants to pursue her. He says
we can remain friends. What do you make of this? Is our
relationship really over? Will he hook up with this other woman?
Or will he be back?
Sandra in New Brunswick

Dear Sandra,

I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad
news, but your EMT friend is going to pursue this other woman. It is something that he feels he
absolutely has to do. While I see
the two of them dating, she is not ready to involve herself in a more serious
relationship with him at this time.
Even though she will make this clear to him, he’s still going to give it
the good old college try.

As for your relationship with
him, he does care about you, and does want the friendship to remain. He doesn’t want to completely close the
door, but he also isn’t on the same emotional plane as you.

Ultimately, I don’t see this man
giving you the relationship that you truly want. This is not to say that he will not come
back to you, but I want you to think about it very carefully when the
opportunity presents. Is second
place good enough?

Brightest Blessings,
Red
Ext. 9226