The Other Woman

Alice in Miami, writes:

I am in love with a married man. We have been in a relationship for eight months. I know that he won’t leave his wife of 30 years. The truth is that I would feel guilty if he did leave his wife for me. I enjoy being with my lover and he enjoys my company. Where do you see our relationship going? What is our future together?

Dear Alice,

It looks as if there is a great deal of comfort and compatibility between you and the man you have been seeing. While you do share a level of love, the boundaries of his marriage are ever-present. You are correct in thinking that your lover isn’t going to leave his wife. At this time, there are no signs of separation or divorce. Because of this, things between the two of you are going to remain pretty much as they are.

As time passes, you’ll struggle a bit more with your choice to be with someone who is not free. However, your love for him and the happiness he brings you is something you don’t want to give up. Even though things will never be exactly ideal, this relationship is fairly solid.

Unless you decide to end things, the two of you will keep seeing and enjoying each other. Because you do not pressure him, and are fairly respectful of his situation, he isn’t seeing a need to alter the relationship he is building with you. There are times that he struggles with his own guilt, but he doesn’t want to be without you.

As long as you can deal with the limitations that come with having a married lover, long-term potential illuminates this relationship. It is only if you find yourself needing more than he is willing to give that things would change.

I hope this helps you.

Brightest Blessings,

Red