Love Is In the Little Things

When it comes to kisses and long, lingering glances, your feelings for each other are obvious. But in addition to the big gestures, there are more subtle (sometimes more significant) ways a woman shows she cares about you that you may be missing

She’s interested in your interests
I’m not suggesting she’s insincere, but when the woman in your life starts taking up your hobbies, it’s generally not because she finds them fascinating. If she’s memorized the ref signals in basketball and has found a way to love Indian food since you started dating, she’s definitely putting in some premium effort. You might even be able to take credit for broadening her horizons — she wouldn’t have changed her routine for just anyone.

She says nothing
Sometimes it’s in what she doesn’t say. If she’s uncharacteristically silent when your plans backfire or the position you so passionately defended turns out to be substantially less than right, she’s telling you something about what you mean to her. Not only does she care about you, she cares about your ego. And in small ways, she’s willing to sacrifice hers to preserve it.

She asks for help
Think she’s hopeless with pickle jars and VCR’s? Her neediness isn’t always about her. While she appreciates your attention, she also recognizes that helping her can help you. It may be her way of trying to make you feel strong, important and needed.

She’s disappointed
Does she insist that you remember your shared dates and events? If she’s bummed because you missed your anniversary or her birthday, it’s not because she missed out on a few thorny flowers. Wanting to celebrate with you is her way of making your time together memorable. She can go out to dinner any time. She wants to go with you. Think it’s really about candles and presents and dressing up? Come on, guys. That stuff is silly. She wants to celebrate with you because it’s you.

She pays attention
She knows you don’t eat asparagus. The sound of other people’s alarm clocks makes you crazy. You hate when people mispronounce espresso, and you love it when she kisses the back of your earlobe. She’s not bored or freakishly observant. The female attention span kicks into high gear when it comes to someone she cares about. She may not even notice she’s collecting trivia, but if your girl takes note of your idiosyncrasies, it’s a sure sign you — peculiar habits and all — have gotten under her skin.

She asks you questions
What are you thinking about? When was your first kiss? If you could meet anyone, who would it be? It’s not an interrogation. Sharing information is one of the foremost ways women bond. If she asks you a lot of questions, it’s because she wants to feel closer to you.